Let's talk....everything in one space.

Not That Into You?

2009-02-25T01:40:00.000-08:00

In the early stages of dating, it's common to dump and get dumped. You're both assessing whether or not this person is right for you, keeping your eyes open for red flags, and refining your own relationship goals.
It's polite not to waste the other person's time when you've decided something won't work out. It might be tempting just to stop taking their phone calls, but it's more mature to break up formally. Even just saying "I'm sorry, this just isn't working for me" will make the message clear.
On the other end, don't wait by the phone. Even if you like someone you've started to date, try not to start picking names for your future children until you've at least agreed to date exclusively. Don't blow off your friends or favorite activities for your new date, and remain open to the possibility that someone else may be the right one for you. When you're sure that you two are both strongly interested in one another, then it's time to reprioritize

Getting Dumped

2009-02-20T01:39:00.000-08:00

It happens to pretty much everyone. You've fallen for someone, only to have him take that job offer in Shanghai, or have her dump you for the electrician.
Some experts advise getting right back out there on the dating scene after a breakup. It's not a good idea to hide in your room and watch cooking shows for months, but it's definitely worth taking some time to grieve your loss before you try again.
Psychologists identify five stages of grief, which might look like this:
Denial: "She's coming back."
Anger: "She didn't deserve me! She's rotten and I hate her!"
Bargaining: "Maybe if I propose, she'll come back."
Depression: "I'm worthless without her. No one else will ever love me."
Acceptance: "She's not coming back, and I'm surviving."
You don't have to go through the stages in order, and you may even skip some of them altogether, but knowing what they are can be helpful in recognizing your own emotions as part of a common process. Be especially careful of getting stuck in depression, which can actually provoke chemical imbalances in your brain. As you move toward acceptance, you can begin to think about what kind of life you want as a single person, and what kind of partner might be an enjoyable part of that life.

Friends With an Ex?

2009-02-14T01:38:00.000-08:00

After a breakup, many people find they miss the other person -- even though they may not miss specific relationship problems -- and thus state the intention of staying "friends."

It's fine to treat one another with civility, particularly if you are likely to meet one another at social events. It's also a kind gesture not to run around bad-mouthing the other person.

But at best, pursuing a friendship with an ex takes up time that you could be spending building a healthy relationship with a new partner. At worst, it could open the door for cheating or rejection.

Relationship Advice and The Rebound

2009-02-11T01:37:00.000-08:00

There's a familiar relationship pattern among people who move quickly into a new romance after the old one dies (or, sometimes, while it's still limping along). Sad and brokenhearted, such a person finds a kindly soul who's willing to offer a comforting shoulder, or bed. The kindly soul offers support and relationship advice, believing that this will lead to healing, renewal, and love. And lo and behold, it does -- but not with the kindly soul. Often, the person who once seemed a source of comfort now becomes just a reminder of old pain. A happy new life begins -- with a happy new partner, someone who wasn't around for any of the bad old stuff. If you're fresh from a breakup, you can recognize this pattern for what it is, and choose to get your comfort from people who don't want long-term love. If you're tempted to play the role of the kindly soul, take two steps back and give the rebounder time and space to heal before expressing your interest.

Break Up Advice

2009-02-06T01:34:00.000-08:00

We all agree it is compassionate to avoid hurting people’s feelings whenever possible. The “whenever possible” clause creates some confusion when ending a relationship, however. This is an inherently painful time for one or both parties. Many tactics have been used, when breaking up with someone, to attempt sidestepping this inevitable truth. They all fail. Worse yet, avoidance of the plain, honest truth causes more misery then is necessary in these situations. Therefore, avoid being evasive or vague. Be direct while taking responsibility for what you want.

There are no strict rules about how to end a relationship. However, a few tips can help when breaking up with someone.

Don’t be evasive, unclear or vague. Be direct and to the point. This is not an enjoyable matter for either of you. Giving false hope or making your partner guess at what you want prolongs everyone’s misery.
Do not break up in stages. You may think this will make the loss easier. Don’t fall for it. This only serves to administer low, medium and high doses of pain over a longer interval.
Don’t lie or invent a story. Things will not add up and the falsehood will be found out sooner or later - usually sooner. Getting over a break up is hard enough without introducing mistrust. Making someone piece together bits of information while leaving him/her to guess what is true causes unnecessary pain.
Don’t blame someone or something else for your choices. Identifying and asking for what you want is an important developmental step and is necessary for mature relationships. Also, hiding behind excuses is pretty transparent. It is likely the other person will see what you are doing. Conversely, if he/she actually believes your excuse, the person will try and problem solve how to remove whatever relationship obstacle you’ve fabricated.
Don’t delay ending a relationship. Once you know you want to break up with someone, it does not help if you deny what you feel. Your partner will sense a change, perhaps reaching out for reassurance. This may feel like “neediness” to you which will increase your feelings of being stuck.

Break Up Lines...to Avoid

2009-02-03T01:31:00.000-08:00

Relatively mature, kind people seem to be rendered nearly brain dead when breaking up with someone. In efforts to avoid conflict, not hurt anyone’s feelings or not look like the bad guy, we often say the oddest things. Let’s be clear, it is not possible to come up with a break up line that makes the process feel good. However, saying the wrong thing can definitely make the whole thing worse.

What shouldn’t you say?

Anything that compares the person you’re breaking up with to an ex or to a new person you've met
Talking about how difficult getting over the break up will be for you
Pointing out how this whole idea is really in the other person’s best interest
Making the famous distinction between loving someone vs. being “in love”
Stating you’re no longer interested but you’d like to keep the benefit or convenience of the sex
There are no perfect words to draw on when ending a relationship. Instead, let’s lay out some break up lines to avoid:

I’m interested in someone else. You’d really like him/her.
You can’t imagine how hard this is for me.
I just don’t want you to get too attached.
I don’t feel that way about you, but the sex has been really good.
I'm getting married this weekend so I won’t be able to see you anymore.
Trust me, I’m doing you a favor.
I need to find myself.
Right now I don't feel like I can give you what you need.
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking….
I don’t want to be together anymore, but we can still have sex if you want.
I love you, but I'm not "in love" with you.
It’s not you, it’s me.

After a Break Up

2009-01-28T01:30:00.000-08:00

Breaking up hurts because it activates a grief reaction. Grief is a profound sense of loss paired with cycles of sadness, anger and hurt. Feelings of betrayal, rejection and abandonment are common at the end of a relationship. Although this is a normal response to losing someone important, you will feel anything but “normal.” Take good care of yourself during this time, don’t try to run from your pain, and reach out to friends and family for support.

Break up quotes are plentiful because as the song says, “Breaking up is hard to do.” All kinds of feelings come up: grief, loss, sadness, anger, betrayal, abandonment. To make matters worse, getting over a break up is not something that can be rushed.

Attempting to hurry past emotions or avoid them altogether is never advised. When unrecognized, minimized or dismissed the pesky things tend to linger even longer! Therefore, the common tricks of keeping so busy you don’t notice yourself or beginning to date immediately are counterproductive. Instead, make time for your feelings, take good care of yourself, and turn to family and friends for support.

How to Break Up With a Girl

2009-01-25T01:26:00.000-08:00

Ending a relationship is awful on both sides. Tons of break up poems, break up songs, break up quotes and break up advice have been written for this very reason. Although there is no avoiding the inevitable awkwardness, take heed men -- we've got a few pieces of advice for you to follow when breaking up with your girl.

Directly state what you want. Simply say what you mean. If you hint around, and she doesn’t want to hear what you are telling her, she will hold onto hope that things are okay.
Do not continue sexual involvement once you’ve decided you want to end things. No matter what you say, she will take this as a sign you still have interest.
Do not promise things you will not deliver. If you are not going to call, do not say you will. If you don’t want her calling you, nicely let her know. If you don’t want to remain friends, be clear about this point.
Be honest. Do not lie about why you are making this choice. It is happening because it is what you want. Do not pretend the break up is due to external circumstances (e.g. busy with work or school obligations).

Do not act as if there is a chance the two of you will get back together, if this is not something you are planning to work toward. And, do not deny interest in dating other girls if you are likely to do so in the near future.

Break Up Help

2009-01-20T01:22:00.000-08:00

The ending of a relationship is generally difficult for both parties. In an attempt to make it easier, many couples attempt to maintain a friendship. We’ve all said it, “Let’s stay friends.” It seems like the most mature and humane way of breaking up with someone. And, we think it will ease the pain…or perhaps the guilt.

While at first glance this appears a helpful strategy in getting over a break up, I encourage you to look again. Except in extremely rare cases where both people want to break up and there are no bad feelings, it’s very hard to go directly from a romantic relationship to friendship.

Being friends right after a break up is often a disaster because there are many raw, hurt feelings flying around. The love shared in a romantic relationship involves certain qualities that don’t immediately go away. With time and distance, those romantic feelings and connections diminish. Hurt feelings heal. However, staying in close contact keeps pain fresh, stirred up.

It’s really a double whammy. Nothing can heal and the full magnitude of what has been lost is disguised by this band-aid (a.k.a. friendship). Although facing grief does not sound appealing, that is precisely how people begin to recover after a break up.

If that isn’t enough to convince you, remember one person usually does not want the break up. Now you’re talking about a friendship in which one person wants more than the other. Imagine how that might work once one of you becomes interested in someone else romantically. Exactly! Messy and painful.

Let time pass and feelings heal. A friendship can then be developed, if it is what both people want.

Long Distance Relationship Advice

2009-01-16T01:21:00.000-08:00

Some long distance couples find this to be the best of both worlds. You can live your life without constant attention to the needs of a partner. Yet, you have a person with whom you connect periodically to get a regular dose of romance and fun.

After a while, this can be a double-edged sword, however.

Many couples in long distance relationships find it so much fun and, in a way, so low-impact on their day-to-day lives, that after a while they become convinced that this relationship is obviously “the one.” And sometimes it is. But it’s hard to judge that from a distance.

Perhaps no long distance relationship advice is more important than to be careful. Do not overestimate a long distance relationship’s potential to translate into a regular relationship where you live in the same town, same home, and are headed towards long-term commitment.

The long distance relationship is an easy place to be on best behavior. Anyone can be accommodating, flexible, and attentive for a long weekend. This says little, in most cases, about how accommodating, flexible and attentive each party will be if you see each other every day, much less live in the same home.

In a nutshell, always remember: a long distance romance is NOT real life. It can be a wonderful little bubble that floats through real life. Party on in that bubble. Live it up.

Real life happens when you step outside that bubble to incorporate both your habits, idiosyncrasies, faults, families, jobs. Life becomes very different from what it was inside that bubble. Make changes to your life with caution

Long Distance Relationship Benefits

2009-01-12T01:20:00.000-08:00

Long distance relationships are not usually something people choose, but they are a fact of life in modern societies where people move around and travel a lot. The saying “absence doth make the heart grow fonder” is usually built-in to long distance romance. Need space? You have it in abundance when experiencing long distance love.

Long distance dating has many benefits:

Every now and then you get to leave your normal life behind. You hop on a train, plane, or automobile and can immerse yourself in someone else’s world (Or alternatively, someone you like drops into your life for a finite time, you play and have fun and then they leave).
You are required to make no major adjustments to your life, no need to make space in the closet or to do somebody else’s laundry.
When together, in your space, in theirs, or in some vacation spot, you know your time is limited. So usually both partners are on best behavior. You both want to make the most of the time and are attentive to each other’s needs for affection, romance, and physical intimacy. It’s hard to pack in a month’s worth of sex, play, and romance into one weekend. But it can be fun to try.
While it’s hard to say goodbye at the end of a weekend, there’s an advantage to long distance relationships. When they leave, you have back your space and can settle into your own habits, your own rhythms, and your own lifestyle without any day-to-day attention to the needs of a boyfriend or girlfriend.
Many long-distance couples find this arrangement to be the best of both worlds, living life without constant attention to the needs of a partner, yet having a person with whom you connect periodically for romance and fun.

One sure-fire way to undermine the advantages of this arrangement, however, is when long-distance relationships start to mirror a relationship with someone you live with. Cell phones, Blackberries, email, and the rest of our communication technologies make is possible to not go a minute without contact with someone on the opposite side of the world. This can be comforting and reassuring at times when you need that immediate contact. At the same time, it can undermine one of the main advantages of a long-distance romance: DISTANCE!

The distance piece of a long-distance romance may be hard at times but it’s also what allows each party to feel a sense of autonomy and freedom from obligation to constantly be on alert to the needs of another. Of course, in the case of an obvious crisis, a parent’s hospitalization or getting laid off from a job, it makes sense to reach out to one’s intimate partner wherever they are. But that’s different from texting, emailing, or calling 5, 10, 25 times a day, just to touch base. If it works for both of you, that can be OK. But if one of you starts feeling a pressure to answer and conflict emerges over the question “Where were you?” … pay attention. An imbalance may be emerging over needs for contact and space.

Long Distance Relationship Tips

2009-01-07T01:16:00.000-08:00

There is a down side to long distance relationships. You may tire of the travel, of not having a partner who’s there to share in the day-to-day joys and travails of a life partnership. At that point, the question facing long distance romance is similar to the question all couples face at some point: do we take it to the next level?

For long distance couples, it’s ideal if you can test moving to the next level before one of you uproots your life and displaces to the other’s home turf. Here’s a list of things to begin the process:

If you haven’t already, start introducing your long distance love to key people in your life. How does it go with your friends, family, workmates? Do they mesh well?
Who has greater flexibility to move? And do you honestly explore what sacrifices will be involved for both parties? It may seem self-evident who should move but all options should be explored so no one feels they’re making all the sacrifices.
Whoever is likely to move, what opportunities exist for that person to create his or her own life, career, friends? Initially, it’s normal to be somewhat dependent on the person who is based there, but the person moving will have to create a life for him or herself or resentment and suffocation can emerge from one or both parties.
Above all, talk about concerns, fears, anxieties. If you can’t lay this stuff on the table now, it won’t get easier once you two are sharing a home and a life and your lives are intertwined.

Long Distance Relationship Arrangements

2009-01-02T01:14:00.000-08:00

OK, so you know that many long distance couples find this arrangement to be the best of both worlds. You can live life without constant attention to a partner’s needs, but have a person with whom you connect for romance and fun.

But what happens if something comes up in your normal life that is a real crisis? How does your long distance boyfriend or girlfriend fit into this situation? Do you not tell them about it? This may be the choice for some who don’t want to bring “real life” into the bubble of that long distance love.

Or do you call them for support? Do you reach out as most folks would, for the comforting voice of your intimate partner?

There is no correct answer here. But it can be a turning point in telling you both about where your relationship is and where it is going.

How each of you handle this situation will tell you a lot. How do they handle your crisis. Or, conversely, how do you feel about them bringing their crisis to you? If you share a crisis with them, are they supportive or avoidant? If they call you, are you empathic or resentful that they’re dumping this on you? A positive response can range from their staying more in touch than normal by calling or emailing regularly to get you through the crisis. Or it could involve their hopping on a plane to be with you. Or it could be anything in between. There’s no correct response in this situation. It’s all about what each of you needs, how well that need is conveyed, and how the response comes back. How it’s handled will tell you a lot about what’s possible for a real relationship down the road.

Long Distance Marriages

2008-12-30T01:11:00.000-08:00

According to LongDistanceRelationships.com, approximately 7 million couples in the United States consider themselves long distance . These include 2.5 to 3 million long distance marriages. When distance is a part of your marriage, direct, open and timely communication becomes even more vital. Being honest about fears and expectations will help maintain trust. This is needed for a commitment to be felt and accepted by both parties in the relationship. The relationship must feel like a priority to each of you even though you are apart. Talking on the phone or online regularly as well as thinking of and talking about your spouse frequently, are necessary to maintain a feeling of connection

Committing when kids are involved

2008-12-26T01:10:00.000-08:00

Couples that would normally be together happily ever after can find serious hurdles to their relationship when children are involved. One partner might think the other is too lenient or strict with the children, or not approve of the child rearing methods used. Studies show that most childless couples get along far better than when children are introduced into the situation.

Realize that the children are a large factor in your relationship, and that they affect how you relate to your partner. Sit down and talk about the way you both feel about this, and see if there are compromises you can make. Perhaps just understanding how you feel might make the situation less stressful

Long Distance Relationship Advice

2008-12-22T01:07:00.000-08:00

Dating After Divorce: Take Time

2008-12-16T01:06:00.000-08:00

When dating after divorce, it’s easy to see your first relationship through rose-colored glasses. This is understandable and normal.

Most of us emerge from any breakup, to say nothing of a divorce, with a lot of pain and heartache. Perhaps we feel like a failure or feel rejected or abandoned. This is especially true if we weren’t the ones who wanted the divorce, but even if the divorce was on our initiative, the process is painful.

The first new relationship after all those painful feelings, therefore, can feel like a gift from heaven, salvation from rejection, loneliness, and failure. And it may be all of these things. But it can also be a rebound relationship, one that pulls you out of those depths and results in your seeing the new relationship through a distorted lens. You might ignore or dismiss obvious areas of incompatibility. Worse yet, you might gloss over potentially dangerous issues like abusive or controlling behaviors, substance abuse, or other risk-taking behaviors.

Some of these risks are reduced by giving yourself a sufficient break between your divorce and dating after the divorce is final. That first relationship after your divorce may be exciting, fun, and full of new experiences. Enjoy it, love, live, and learn. But be careful.

Relationship Advice and The Rebound

2008-12-11T01:05:00.000-08:00

Number One First Date Tip: Safety

2008-12-06T01:03:00.000-08:00

The beginning stage of a relationship can be stressful. However, don’t let your anxiety about what to wear or say make you forget to plan for safety. When you are meeting someone for the first time, this needs to be a consideration. Even if you feel like you know this person because of Internet dating time together, taking some simple precautions is a good idea. Things such as driving separately, letting a friend know where you will be, and containing your first date activities to a public place are easy strategies you can employ.

Internet dating safety can be maintained with some simple planning. Once you’ve chatted online and spoken for quite some time on the phone, meeting in person is the next step. If you’ve determined you are ready to move to this level, exercise this first date advice:

· Drive separately to a public meeting place.

· Tell a friend where you are going and when you expect to be home. Follow-up by checking in with your friend at a predetermined time and/or when you return home.

· Never leave the public place, go home with the person or invite your date to your home.

· Immediately end the date if you feel pressured in any way.

· Do not get drunk or tipsy. Drinking impairs judgment leading to choices you may not normally make.

Break Up Advice

2008-11-30T00:58:00.000-08:00

We all agree it is compassionate to avoid hurting people’s feelings whenever possible. The “whenever possible” clause creates some confusion when ending a relationship, however. This is an inherently painful time for one or both parties.

Many tactics have been used, when breaking up with someone, to attempt sidestepping this inevitable truth. They all fail. Worse yet, avoidance of the plain, honest truth causes more misery then is necessary in these situations. Therefore, avoid being evasive or vague. Be direct while taking responsibility for what you want.

There are no strict rules about how to end a relationship. However, a few tips can help when breaking up with someone.

Don’t be evasive, unclear or vague. Be direct and to the point. This is not an enjoyable matter for either of you. Giving false hope or making your partner guess at what you want prolongs everyone’s misery.

Do not break up in stages. You may think this will make the loss easier. Don’t fall for it. This only serves to administer low, medium and high doses of pain over a longer interval.

Don’t lie or invent a story. Things will not add up and the falsehood will be found out sooner or later - usually sooner. Getting over a break up is hard enough without introducing mistrust. Making someone piece together bits of information while leaving him/her to guess what is true causes unnecessary pain.

Don’t blame someone or something else for your choices. Identifying and asking for what you want is an important developmental step and is necessary for mature relationships. Also, hiding behind excuses is pretty transparent. It is likely the other person will see what you are doing. Conversely, if he/she actually believes your excuse, the person will try and problem solve how to remove whatever relationship obstacle you’ve fabricated.

Don’t delay ending a relationship. Once you know you want to break up with someone, it does not help if you deny what you feel. Your partner will sense a change, perhaps reaching out for reassurance. This may feel like “neediness” to you which will increase your feelings of being stuck.

Relationship Advice - Conquering Boredom

2008-11-28T01:47:00.000-08:00

Has your relationship fallen into a rut? What do you do to revive the relationship before it stagnates and falls apart?

You've been together for several years now. Sex has become routine and your relationship is in a rut. Those early days of euphoria that you felt when he/she looked your way are long gone. What do you do to revive the relationship before it stagnates and falls apart?

The Symptoms - Every relationship faces it. Boredom. Everyday is pretty much the same. You and your partner take each other for granted. Sex has become routine. You no longer catch yourself having warm fuzzy feelings about your partner and dreaming up ways to make them happy. Instead your priorities have shifted to work, the kids, money, or what you'll get mom for Christmas. When and where it started, you're not sure. One day you wake up and it occurs to you that your sex life is boring. You may even blame your partner. The cute coworker may have caught your eye and now your wondering why your partner can't give you that kind of attention. Ok, you recognize the symptoms but how do you fix it?

The Cure - The thing that separates your relationship with your partner from every other relationship is sex. It therefore stands to reason that the way to revive your relationship is through sex. Consider it as playtime between you and your partner. Not only should it be satisfying, it should also be fun. Here are the steps that will help bring some fun back into your sex life.

Make it a priority. First of all you need to make time for intimacy. The three main obstacles to intimacy are time, energy, and privacy. By making sex a priority, it is easier to find opportunities when both of you have the time and energy. Privacy can always be arranged.

Feel Sexy. Do whatever it takes to make yourself feel sexy. Sex is more satisfying for both of you if you are not self-conscious. Work out or dress up. Women are often more self-conscious than men. Ladies your body does not have to be perfect. If your partner loves you and you feel sexy, he will see you as sexy. Lingerie may be a way of making yourself feel attractive.

Communicate. Let your partner know that you want to break the routine. Never be accusing or negative when telling your partner that you want to change things or you will probably get a negative reaction. You may find out that your partner feels like you do and wants to get out of the rut you've fallen into.

Do something different Break the routine. Remember, it's all about fun so be creative. You might plan a day where you try to tempt each other to see who will give in first. Perhaps you could read a book and learn a new technique. You might try a romantic atmosphere with candles and music or a roaring fire. You could be adventurous and try role playing. For example, dress up and pretend you are strangers. Another idea is for each of you to write down a fantasy during the week and on Saturday you do his and on Sunday, hers. If you are uncomfortable coming up with ideas on your own, you might try a sex game and let the game lead you. Once your sex life is back on track, you will find that you feel closer to your partner.

Why bother - Never reach the point where you are not touching each other. Touch, whether erotic or not, is crucial to keeping your relationship on track. Again, this is not a relationship that you want to be like others in your life. One or both of you will end up cheating. Cheating often stems from boredom with the relationship. Do not give into this urge as you will be giving up more than you are gaining. If you get caught and break up, you will have all the time in the world to fool around with whoever, whenever you want. In the end you will still feel empty. What you are looking for cannot be found with a stranger. Working on your relationship, nourishing it with your attention and love, will give a much more fulfilling result. We are all looking for that special someone to fill that emptiness inside us. Who will love us through the good and bad, give our life meaning, our rock when we feel weak and our pillow when we fall. Starting over with someone new every few years makes this very difficult to accomplish.

In conclusion, think back to when you met your partner. Think about your time together and the good things you have shared. Is anything else in your life worth more effort than building on that love? It's like a precious flower. Feed it, water it, nurture it and it will grow. Tend to it only when it crosses your mind and it will wither and die. Communicate, appreciate, and have fun. These are the key ingredients to adding zest to a relationship rut.

Relationship Tip: Women Love Us But

2008-11-15T01:52:00.000-08:00

"How can she possibly go out with that guy?" Keep your ears open long enough and you will hear that question or at least a variation of it a number of times in your life.

Some women ask this question not because they want an answer but more so out of plain jealousy. They want what another woman already has. That is all part of the game. Still others really are curious as to why she would even pick this particular guy to build a relationship.

No one can fully understand romance or human compatibility. It is what it is but that does not mean women love everything about us. In fact the majority could really do well without the following:

1. Selfishness

It's all about you. When the circumstances directly affect her, you find away to become the center of it. Dating and relationships are about give and take. Nobody and I mean nobody should get their way all the time or even want to. Not only does it make for dullness in the partnership but you are also buying stock in the resentment portfolio. It may not come back to bite you tomorrow or the next day but the longer the selfishness continues the more likely the resentment will grow. And when it comes to the surface you will be in for a nasty shock.

This also includes being a power freak. You will decide what, when, where, why and how much in every facet of the relationship. You want to be king of the roost but are not willing to make her the your queen. She is not your servant; she is your partner so learn to trust her decision making process and be prepared to let her lead sometimes.

2. Huh?

That means you were not listening. This drives women up the wall. It says that a: you do not respect her opinion and b: she is not worth listening to. Communication is high on the list of priorities for many women and listening is a huge part of the equation. If you need to train yourself to listen than do it. Besides that she will also appreciate the effort on your part.

3. The Mama's Boy

A good relationship with your mom is to be cherished and respected. No woman should begrudge you that. However running to mama to solve some problems you maybe having in your relationship or worse still using her as a standard to routinely criticize your partner is a definite no-no. It shows a strong lack of independence. Keep in mind also that while women may have maternal instincts that does not imply they want to assume the role of matriarch in your relationship. Two consenting adults means just that.

There are of course many other things that women don't particularly like about us but it would probably take days to list them all (You can hear the ladies now saying think in terms of years). That's fine. No one is perfect so follow the three tips mentioned do the best you and watch it pay dividends.

Relationship Advice: 10 Ways to Survive a Break Up

2008-11-08T01:52:00.000-08:00

Breaking up is always painful. Here are some suggestions to help you get through it.

Enlarge ImageBreak ups are never easy. You are a bundle of jealous, hurt, angry, resentful emotions. Your mood can swing from depression to bitter anger. The only thing you seem to think about is what went wrong, can I get him/her back or I’ll show him/her. The main theme in your life is ‘How can I feel better right NOW?’ Here are some suggestions that I hope will help.

Friends and Family. I know this may seem obvious but lean on your friends and family. Spend time doing things together, not just talking and thinking about the break up. If this isn’t enough, you may consider a support group or counseling.

Resist the urge to beg. You want them back but not at any price. At the time it may seem the right thing to do but think about it. In the long run they will lose respect for you. This doesn’t mean don’t try to work things out. If there is a chance you can work things out, go for it. However, if your partner has made it clear that in their eyes, the relationship is over, begging will not help and may hurt the situation.

Make a change in your life. Find a new way to spend your time. Take a class, join a gym, adopt a pet, or volunteer. Do anything that will make you feel good about yourself. Your ego is probably feeling bruised right now. Find a way to counteract that.

Understand your mistakes but also realize that you are not a failure. Don’t beat yourself up. If you made mistakes, then yes, learn from them but dwelling on what might have been won’t help. It takes two to make a relationship, it also takes two to end one. You weren’t the only one who made mistakes. It may not seem useful to you now, but a lot of times the things you learned from this experience will make your next relationship stronger, as long as you make the necessary changes.

Start Dating. You won’t feel like it at first, but don’t stay away from other people for an extended period of time. Going out with other people can help the healing process and boast your ego.

Don’t fall prey to others. There will be people trying to sell you this or that, guaranteed to win back your partner. Don’t let people take advantage of you while you are vulnerable. If you do buy something, understand that while there is a chance it could help, there is also a chance that it won’t.

Take up a hobby. Learn something new. There is probably something you’ve always wanted to try but never had the time. You have the time, do it.

Don’t rush into another relationship. While starting to date can help you feel better, it’s not a good idea to rush right into another relationship. Take time to heal before making any commitments or someone will probably end up getting hurt.

Avoid dwelling on it. I know it’s impossible not to think about it, but, if you find yourself doing so for an extended period of time, find a way to take your mind off of it. Call a friend; go to the gym, whatever comes to mind. If nothing seems to work, try this: Make a list of reasons why you are better off now. This could include I have time to do the things I want to do. I can date anyone I want to. I can find a partner who will appreciate me the way I am and stop wasting time on a doomed relationship. Think about the things they did that drove you crazy, because there are some. Don’t look back with rose colored glasses and only remember the good things. Don’t have the idea in your head that if only we were back together I would be happy. Wrong. Wouldn’t they have a lot to answer for if you did get back together? Leaving you was probably the biggest mistake they will ever make. Let them dwell on it, you move on!

Build your ego. I’ve touched on this already but it is very important. Find ways to feel better about yourself. This could be anything from getting a haircut to buying some new clothes. You could take a class on self improvement. If nothing else, you should do this: Make a list of things that make you a great person. Don’t sit there and tell me you can’t think of anything. I don’t buy it. Try again. Are you kind? Patient? Intelligent? Cook like a pro? Can fix anything? There are things that make you great. WRITE them down and whenever you feel low, read your list and add to it. You are you and you are great so don’t let anyone ever make you feel that you aren’t.

Relationship Tips: 16 Practical Dramatic Ways to Know if He/She is REALLY Changing

2008-11-03T01:48:00.000-08:00

When there is crisis in a relationship, one person often promises, "I'm going to change." Here are some practical signs that your spouse or significant other is truly changing for the better. Every relationship hits a snag, or worse, a major crisis (such as infidelity), that demands significant change if the relationship is to survive.

So...there are promises to change and the two of you embark upon a new path. You watch carefully.

"Can I trust this change? Is it permanent? temporary? How long will it last? Is he/she REALLY changing?"

Good questions. Here are 16 ways to know if the change is going to last:

1. You notice opposite behaviors and nonverbal communication. Passivity becomes activity. Recklessness transforms into thoughtfulness. Aloofness turns into engagement.

2. You find yourself surprised. "Hmmmm, this hasn't happened before, but is really nice! I wonder where this came from? But, I will take it!"

3. He/she expresses more curiosity about you, about him/her self and others. He/she observes more closely what happens in relationships, without criticism or defensiveness.

4. You feel that somehow there has been a shifting of gears. There is a different rhythm or flow in the relationship. Much less effort. Much less tension.

5. You find yourself noticing how differently he/she talks. The words seem different. The emotional tone of the words seem different.

6. The negative times, where you felt very stuck, helpless and hopeless, are less intense, happen less often and you seem to have more effective ways to move out of those times more quickly.

7. Your gut (intuition) tells you that this is ok. You begin to trust that part of you more implicitly. A part of you is clapping and cheering inside!

8. He/she seems to have more direction and purpose. Less drifting. He/she seems to be driven more by internal desires and wishes rather than reacting to people or external circumstances. He/she takes up interesting hobbies or finds more enthusiasm for career.

9. The changes seem to be more consistent and carry over for a longer period of time. More stability. Fewer swings. You seem more consistently on the right path.

10. More concern is expressed for family, children and close friends.

11. Words such as: "I promise. I'll try. Or, I'm going to..." are NOT in his/her vocabulary.

12. Moments of effusive crying, tear letting and chest beating are gone. Apologies are past and there is a sense of working right here right now to create what we want down the line.

13. You hear no blaming of others. He/she does NOT make others responsible for his/her actions. You sense that he/she is intent upon responsibly creating his/her world.

14. There is good eye contact.

15. He/she is taking great steps toward self care both physically, emotionally and spiritually. He/she can state what he/she needs and negotiate with you to get those needs met. At the same time, your personal needs are considered.

16. You worry much less about what will happen next.

Relationship Advice: 10 Ways to Prevent a Break Up

2008-10-25T01:50:00.000-07:00

Every relationship has highs and lows. Here are 10 tips to keep your relationship strong.

The question I am asked most often is: I think he/she is getting ready to leave me. What do I do? There isn't an easy answer for this or there wouldn’t be any break ups. Every situation is different and sometimes breakups are inevitable. However this is not always the case and there are things you can do before you reach the breaking point that will help.

Here are the 10 most important things:

Communicate. Communication is important. If you find that when you try to communicate your feelings to your partner it always leads to an argument, try writing your feelings down. Read through what you’ve written. If you find things that are just petty problems with no real validity, eliminate them. Try to find the sources behind your words. For example, jealousy, are you jealous because you know he/she is cheating, or does it go deeper? Did someone cheat on you in the past and now you don’t trust anyone? Is your partner giving you what you need to feel secure? Once you realize where the feelings are coming from, you can address fixing the problem.

Resist making accusations. Approach your partner calmly, without being defensive. Tell him/her the problem. Don’t be accusing or they will become defensive and yes, you will end up in an argument. If you find it’s easier to write it in a letter, then do so. Leave while they read it so you aren’t hovering over them, waiting for their reaction. Let them process what you have said. Again, do not be accusing. Tell them you want to make your relationship better. Have suggestions for BOTH of you, not just them. Be sure you know the core problem and aren’t just mentioning a symptom.

Refrain from insulting your partner during arguments. Fighting dirty can quickly become a habit and eventually someone will say something that the other person cannot forget, or worse, forgive.

Take time to tell your partner why you love him/her. Not once, but often. This can be something as small as a compliment on how they look. Your partner needs to know you appreciate them. Don’t just assume they know. Everyone likes to be reminded they are loved.

Be supportive and look for ways to give your partner the things they need the most. Even if they don’t tell you what they need, you can figure it out if you pay attention. Some people have a hard time telling you what they need but there are clues. If you’re not sure, ask.

Don’t neglect yourself. If your needs aren’t being met, find a way to let your partner know. If you are unhappy, you will eventually blame your partner. It’s much easier to let them know, in a positive way, the things you need.

Never try to solve a problem when you are angry. Take time to cool down. I know this can seem impossible at times but think about it. Is anything ever really solved when you are yelling at each other?

Set aside some time for just the two of you. If not once a week, then at least once a month. This should be quality, alone time, however you two choose to spend it. You might try arranging a specific day each week and take turns planning what you will do.

Discuss decisions that affect the both of you and try to find a solution that will keep you both happy. Never make an important decision that affects you both without talking to your partner.

Don’t Lie! Everyone lies occasionally. It’s in our nature. This isn’t an excuse to lie to your partner. Every time you are caught in a lie, a little more trust is taken away. A healthy relationship requires trust. Never ever lie about things important to the relationship. You’re better off facing the music if you’ve done something wrong then being caught in a lie.

This won’t keep you together but it is important to mention. Know when it’s time to leave and make the break.Don’t let anyone use you or abuse you. Most problems can be worked out if both people in the relationship make an effort to improve things. There are some exceptions. It’s time to leave if the relationship becomes abusive. Do not hope things will get better because he/she says they will change. Leave! If at some future time they actually do change, you can consider getting back together then. Another deal breaker is infidelity. If your partner cheats on you, there is a good chance that even if you do stay together, the trust that keeps a relationship alive will be gone. I’m not saying you can’t survive it, but it will take a great deal of effort from both people and your partner will have to stop. Never give them more than one chance to do so or you will be setting yourself up for a very destructive emotional roller coaster. If your partner sees that it’s possible to cheat and you will keep forgiving, why would they change?

Parental counseling

2008-10-15T01:39:00.000-07:00

After a divorce, it is common to see that parents who are usually overwhelmed with their separation forget about their children wellbeing. Unfortunately there are some basic rights of kids that are not preserved during a marital separation. Some of them are:

The right to live in a safe environment.
The right to never be forced to choose between the parents and to be allowed to love both parents and be loved by both of them.
The right to be kept outside of the separation of the parents.
The right to keep the child/sibling role that naturally represents them.
The right to see grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins of both sides of the family after the separation.

These statements express circumstances that become easily vulnerable when parents go through a process of separation.

When a marriage is consolidated, it grows around the capability of two people to co-create life. So being this capability essential in the origin of a marital couple, it is logic to affirm that in case the couple bond breaks in the future, the parental tie that once attached the two people should always last.

Of course, after a separation, the family link that should persist taking care of the kids will not remain exactly the same. However, the changes in the family could be experienced by the relatives as part of the family evolution. In order to experience a marital separation in this constructive way it is needed that both sides of the breaking couple respect each other and be conscious of their mutual responsibility for all they lived and decided together.

When the two separated partners honour the life experience that involved creating a family –beyond their later marital disagreements–, they not only help themselves by preventing the lose of life sense, but also they protect their children wellbeing.

Relationship Advice for Men - 10 Ways to Seduce A Woman

2008-09-29T01:31:00.000-07:00

Tips for men looking for ways to succeed with women

Enlarge ImageI have written this article by request but want to begin by saying that I in no way encourage men to treat women like objects. Men, this is a guide to help you win over a woman that you have a genuine interest in. If you are just looking for a one night stand then this article probably won't help you much. Lesson one, satisfaction comes with a sincere relationship and learning each others likes and dislikes. That being said, I hope you find something useful here that will help you give the woman of your dreams a reason to look your way.

Be sincere. Compliment her on something you truly admire. Hollow compliments can often be sensed. A compliment that she knows you mean will have much more impact. This doesn't mean you can throw out a compliment and then get naked, but it is a good first step. The compliment should NOT be 'you have great knockers.' Go for the eyes, hair, intelligence, sense of humor, something along those lines. On the other hand, too many compliments can come off sounding insincere. One or two sincere compliments are best.

Listen to her. She will give you clues about what she likes. At some later time, you can show that you remember what she has said and it makes a difference to you. This will earn you big points.

Be real. Don't exaggerate to make yourself sound better. Don't tell her lies just because you think it will help. These things have a way of turning around and biting you.

Don't offer advice unless asked. It could come off sounding like you are telling her what to do. Just listen and be supportive.

Do not talk about sex unless she brings it up. This one is pretty self explanatory.

Don't act desperate. Just let things flow naturally. Desperation is an unappealing quality in either sex. Playing a little hard to get can actually be appealing.

Avoid talking about yourself too much. Let her talk and if she wants to know, she will ask. An ongoing conversation about how big your muscles are or how fast your car is will not score many points. Bragging about how well endowed you are is a big no-no too. On the other hand, silence doesn't work either. Look around and find something to talk about. Preferably about her.

Avoid letting your eyes wonder to other women when you are with her. Talking about other women or your ex are both no-no's too. If you are out with her, let her know you like being with her by respecting her feelings and keeping your eyes and mind on her.

Treat her with respect. Don't call her chick, broad, dude or any other name unless you have been together for a while and you come up with pet names for each other. Respect is crucial and a good woman will not be interested in sex with you until she knows you respect her. If a one night stand is what you have in mind, then don't lead her into believing you want a relationship with her. Playing with her feelings is cruel and something no one should do to anyone.

Don't make her feel like because you have spent money on her, she should sleep with you. Making her feel this way will generally have the opposite affect. All you have bought is her time and the opportunity to prove to her that you are worth a second look. The rest is up to you.

Relationship Advice: Use these 3 Simple Tips to Screw Up Your Relationship

2008-09-27T01:28:00.000-07:00

Tired of that great healthy relationship you are enjoying? Looking to screw it up royally? Then by all means try these tips

By all accounts the divorce rate in America has been on the decline. According to USA Today, it is now at its lowest level since 1970. Certainly this is a cause for celebration but it does not negate the fact that The United States still leads the rest of the world in that department or that one out of every two marriages will end in divorce.

There are a myriad of reasons as to why many relationships end badly. Sometimes in spite of the best efforts of both parties it still does not work. But more often than not many a couple has made a concerted effort (consciously or unconsciously) to sabotage their relationship. While there are a number of ways to throw a monkey wrench into the proceedings, the following must be at the top of any list when it comes to breaking up.

1. Communication Barrier

This is one of the main reasons relationship coaches remain in business. Many couples don't talk. If they do talk at it all it's usually past each other or turns it an argument. Lack of communication also is to a certain degree a lack of trust. You don't believe you can share more of yourself. Whether it's fear of rejection or just not believing they will be understood, the lack of trust can easily turn into not sharing anything at all.

The added side affect is that it has a tendency to put the other person on the defensive. They believe now they have done something wrong and since you are not giving them any indication one way or the other, the tension grows.

2. Money

We've seen many shows where a couple arguing over money has been played for laughs but in the real world it's no joke. A survey by Redbook and Smart Money magazines shows over seventy percent of people in a relationship talk to their partners at least once a week about money. It is so easy with soaring prices across the economic board for a discussion about basic household finances to get heated. Taking care of the family and home should be a gimme but even in that situation two people are bound to have a different perspective.

This is true even if you don't have money troubles. One partner might not feel it's a big deal since they have money to burn. That can cause some resentment particularly if one of you has been the primary breadwinner. No one can (or should) get their way all the time in any healthy relationship but there has to be boundaries. By all means make sure you and your partner do not work out a clear understanding or honor any financial decision you may reach.

3. Player, Player

This should go without saying. So why doesn't it? In a recent study conducted by Infidelity Facts, 57% of men and 53% women surveyed admit to cheating on their partner regardless of whether it is dating or marriage. Excuses can range from they are stuck in a loveless relationship and the new person makes them feel alive again to the thrill of sneaking around and doing something a bit reckless.

Whatever the excuse, introducing a third person into the picture means in essence the current relationship is over. "I love my spouse but…" is not going to cut it. Any chance to work out whatever problems you may be experiencing in your relationship will disappear once you get entangled with another person.

There is no quick fix or magic cure when it comes to relationships. It's hard work day by day, hour by hour. Even couples that have been together awhile and think they have the problems solved are shocked when life turns their relationship upside down. However if you want your relationship to end badly feel free to use any or all of the techniques above. They are guaranteed to do the trick.

Building Relationships, Commitment and Love - A is for...

2008-09-23T01:26:00.000-07:00

An alphabetical guideline for building satisfying relationships, commitment, friendship, and love. We discuss interactions with those significant others in your life including that special person, whether or not you are already together. While we focus on the positive, we don't ignore the mistakes that are so easy to make but hard to repair. This article introduces the series and focuses on attitude, affection, and acknowledgment.

We all want to succeed in our interpersonal relationships, whether with family, coworkers, friends, or that special someone. Why is it sometimes so difficult? Isn't there a secret that will help you succeed, a checklist of things to do, and just as important things not to do to help achieve the relationships that you want, that you need?

We can't offer you a magic list, but we truly believe that our suggestions will help you succeed where you may have failed in the past. Please remember that despite any appearances to the contrary, other people are looking for the same relationship success that you are. To some extent our suggestions are common sense. You may say to yourself, why didn't I think of that. You may also say to yourself that's what I tried in the past and it didn't work. Remember, Rome wasn't built in a day. Just like you can't lose in one week the excessive weight that you gained over the decades by poor eating habits, you can't repair your relationship deficiencies overnight. But you can see progress immediately. This should give you the strength to move forward.

We have so many suggestions that we are going to provide them in virtually alphabetical order. Let's start with A.

A is for attitude. Attitude is one of the most important aspects of relationship building, whether dealing with coworkers... you know the list. If you go around thumping your chest like Tarzan or a gorilla, screaming for all to hear "I am the greatest" don't be surprised that people aren't standing in line to be with you. Frankly, if you were the greatest, don't you think that people would know without your having to tell them? Wouldn't your greatness somehow seep through the fog of interpersonal relationships? Yes, my friend, attitude is a big one. If you have a chip on your shoulder than don't be surprised that people somehow manage to avoid your presence.

So what should my attitude be? Should I be self-effacing? I think not. Why not let people know that you are glad to spend time with them? Let them feel the affection that you have for them. This leads us to another A term, affection.

A is for affection. I'm not talking about the hots. Or even the lukewarms. Let people know that you want to be with them. Let people know that their friendship or love (please don't confuse these all-important qualities) is important to you and well worth working for. We can all do with more friendliness in our life. Somehow a big smile can help grease the wheels of interpersonal relationships. Remember, your vis-à-vis is also looking for relationship success. She or he wants to be acknowledged. And that's our third and final term for this article.

A is for acknowledgment. Everybody needs it. When you have done something special you want people to know about it. Well guess what. This phenomenon works in both directions. As for most of our points, acknowledgment is also a couple's question. Don't be stingy about letting your partner know that he or she has done a fine job. Nobody wants to be taken for granted. People don't want their significant other to be absent for them... And this brings us to another series; namely pitfalls to avoid in building relationships, commitments, and love.

procrastination

2008-09-17T01:03:00.000-07:00

Have you ever experienced the state of
procrastination? All of us have one time or another!
Procrastination is the number one killer of success.

It is the single most common state that keeps people
from taking action Knowing that there is an important
task at hand, you keep putting it off.

Have you ever had to start work on a project but kept
doing everything else that would delay you in getting
started? You cleaned your desk, got a drink of water,
checked your emails,walked around and finally said, ''I
think I will do it tomorrow!''

Has there been another time when you felt totally
motivated in getting started on a project? A time when
you just sat down and got it done immediately?

I believe we are aware that this situation rarely
happens, never happening in times when we need to get
something done.

We Create our States of Motivation and Procrastination

We have to understand that we create entirely
different states using our physiology and internal
re-presentation. When we understand this, we will be
able to change, interrupt and change states whenever
we need to.

When you were procrastinating, you were using your
physiology in a particular way. Your breathing was
probably slow and shallow. Your muscles were droopy,
your eyes were looking down and your facial muscles
were probably flaccid.

What about your internal re-presentation? You were
probably seeing pictures of yourself having a tough
time, being overwhelmed and getting frustrated. You
were probably saying to yourself in the most weary and
bored tone of life, "Must I do this now? Can I do it
later?"

How do we create Motivation?

A question we have to ask ourselves, when we are in a
motivated state, taking action and accomplishing our
tasks, how did we create that?

Our physiology was probably different. We were sitting
differently, breathing differently and moving
differently. We were probably re-presenting the task
very differently in our mind.

We were seeing ourselves getting results, having fun
and doing things effortlessly. We were probably
saying, "do it now!" "Let''s get it done!" in a more
excited, higher pitched tone of voice.

Remember, our states are hardly managed consciously.
We do not consciously shift our physiology nor do we
control our internal re-presentations with the
intention of controlling our states.

Instead, our minds are allowed to run on autopilot
causing us to lose control of our own states, ensuing
in mediocre results that we are not to pleased about.

Now that we are aware that states of motivation and
procrastination are entirely created by us, the
responsibility is on us to learn and take charge of
our physiology and internal representation,
propelling us to attain the greater results we desire.

To Your Success,

DO ALL THE GOOD YOU CAN, IN ALL THE WAYS YOU CAN , TO ALL THE PEOPLE
YOU CAN, AS LONG AS EVER YOU CAN ....COZ YOUR GOOD WORKS WILL SPEAK FOR
YOU IN THE DAY OF TROUBLE.

The Art Of Change

2008-09-13T01:01:00.000-07:00

Reframing - The Art Of Changing Meaning

The process of turning a negative experience into a
positive one is
called reframing.

The two ways in which you can do this is Content
Reframing and
Context Reframing.

Content Reframing

Content Reframing is the process of changing a
negative experience
into a positive one by changing the meaning of the
experience.
Remember, every event has multiple meanings. The
meaning we choose
to focus on is what becomes real for us.

The best way to do a content reframe is to ask the
question, ''What
else can this mean?'' ''How can this benefit or empower
me instead of
depressing me?''

For example, if the recession hit when you were about
to start your
business, you could content reframe it by saying,
''Good! This means
that business costs, like rental and salaries, will be
lower and
allow us to break even faster''.

Or you could say, ''Good! This means prospective
clients will be
more open to listening to suppliers who offer better
value for
money.'' There are multiple reasons why starting a
business in a
recession will be a positive experience!

What if someone told you, ''My son does not stop
talking'' You could
reframe this negative comment by saying ''Good that
means he must be
full of ideas'', or , ''This means he must be very
intelligent.''

If the person you love leaves you for someone else,
reframe the
loss by saying, ''Good. This means that I can find
someone who truly
loves me'' or ''this means I can find someone who is
more caring,
beautiful and loyal.''

Context Reframing
Another way to reframe an experience is to do a
context reframe. A context reframe is the process of changing a negative
experience into a positive one by changing the context from which it is perceived.
Have you ever had a negative experience only to look
back at it five years later and say, ''That was a blessing in
disguise?'' In a different context (i.e. the future), the meaning of
that experience changed from bad to good.

In doing a context reframe, you must ask the question,
''in a different time or place, how would the meaning be beneficial?''
You see, everything that seems bad now, when put into a different time or place, could appear beneficial.
Going back to the first example of starting a business
in a recession, you could use a context reframe by saying,
''When the economy picks up, the company will be positioned to do
very well as it has been tested & strengthened by the recession''.
You could do a context reframe on the boy who talks
all the time by saying, ''When he grows up, he will make a good public
speaker'' (context of time). Or you could also say, ''The fact that he talks
all the time will certainly earn him a place on the school debating
team (context of place). Are you getting the hang of it?
How we represent or (frame) our experiences determine
our response
and the outcomes we achieve. Therefore we must learn
to constantly
frame experiences in ways that empower ourselves and
the people around us.
When we change the way we represent (frame) something,
we totally
change the meaning and the emotions associated with
that
experience. As a result, we change the decisions we
make and the
actions we take.

You must learn how to create resourceful meanings out
of every
experience. Successful leaders and entrepreneurs do
this to empower
themselves and others to reach their goals.

Morals in Life

2008-09-09T01:01:00.000-07:00

Are you aware of the headlines in the newspapers. Do you find it fascinating because of the gossip and the excitement. Famous teenagers drug addicts , some of them so thin ,but no one see that there is something wrong with that picture, no one see the cry for help behind the money or the nasty attitudes , they just see people that is looking for publicity. Marriages in Hollywood nothing , you can marry today divorce in minutes, it was for fun or it was a sudden moment of madness.

No one realize that our morals are flushed down the toilets , because famous people are doing it, it must be the in thing besides I am a nobody so who am I to pass judgement. That is the biggest mistake that we make in life. Marriages used to be sacred between a wife and her husband who made a commitment infront of God and to one another. Now however there is nothing wrong , with keeping someone on the side and stay married.What is happening to all the things that was sacred to us. When you get pregnant it is easy for some people , either addoption or abortion , why would we kill another human being , that is helpless who had no choice in the matter when conceived, there are so many women who would give anything to have a baby like that, hold them love them.

Women used to be treated with respect now, they are being treated as tramps .Why we ask? . Where do men get ideas like that, oh yes it is in the magazines, the breast of women hanging out, it almost touches the floor. The clothing only enough material to cover the most important areas , and let''s not forget the newest trend , no more wearing panties at all. That is part of the problem ,because now women are labeled easy and they can get rape ,worser even babies , in South-Africa. Why don''t we as women speak out and say enough is enough, we are not all the same.

Let''s not forget the silent cries of those who told that when they are abused molested, by friends ,family members even parents ,what is happening the world is becoming one sick place to live in.Why are we so busy that we can not notice things like that do something about it. But no it is not our problem, we have our own so let''s look the other way, they can solve the problems.

Television, sex...sex...sex need I say more , where are the shows with morals, who helped the normal guy like me on the street, make me believe that anything is possible. The shows that made you laugh , when you need it , give you inspiration ,where characters face the problems that you have, but find a way of solving it, and you think hey that was me. Now instead people are portrayed as oversex animals , with bush manners, give each other the eye and have sex, hey they teach us to forget about illnesses such as Aids or any diseases that can be transmitted trough sex.

Morals are we so blinded by everything that glitters and includes a lot of money, that even a monkey look beautiful when we know , that it is ugly as hell. Some of us still care , but the majority does not, do you see a future because I don''t . I can only see a future where everything is wrong becames right and you know what, when you do not agree you will be the odd one out, and be stoned for it.

INTELLIGENCE AND WISDOM ARE TWO DIFFERENT THINGS

2008-09-03T01:00:00.000-07:00

INTELLIGENCE IS A WONDERFUL QUALITY TO HAVE. HOWEVER, IF I HAD TO CHOOSE BETWEEN INTELLIGENCE & WISDOM, I’D SAY THAT WISDOM IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN INTELLIGENCE IN OUR LIFE JOURNEY OF CREATING JOY AND ABUNDANCE. THERE ARE MANY HIGHLY INTELLIGENT PEOPLE WHO FAIL TO USE THEIR INTELLIGENCE TO THEIR BEST ADVANTAGE. DO YOU KNOW THAT THERE ARE ALSO MANY EXTREMELY INTELLIGENT PEOPLE WHO LIVE VERY UNHAPPY LIVES???

WISDOM IS A QUALITY THAT YOU CANNOT ACCURATELY MEASURE. IT’S INVISIBLE. IT INCLUDES MANY ASPECTS OF LIFE SUCH AS PERSPECTIVE, SPONTANEITY, CREATIVITY, AND SOCIAL SKILLS. WISDOM IS YOUR SENSE OF KNOWING, AN INTUITIVE FEELING. WISDOM IS SEEING SOMETHING IN A NONHABITUAL MANNER. IT’S SEEING AN OLD PROBLEM IN A TOTALLY NEW, FRESH WAY. WISDOM HELPS US DISCOVER AND TRUST OURSELVES MORE. IT ALSO HELPS US TO FREE OURSELVES FROM OUR FIXED AND HABITUAL PATTERNS OF THINKING AND PROBLEM SOLVING.
IN A NUTSHELL, WISDOM IS THE ABILITY TO SEE AN ANSWER WITHOUT HAVING TO THINK OF AN ANSWER. WISDOM DOES EXIST OUTSIDE OF OUR THINKING MIND. WISDOM HELPS US SEE THINGS MORE CKEARLY THAN OUR THINKING MIND AND UNLIKE THE THINKING MIND, WISDOM CONTAINS NO WORRY.

HERE’S A STORY THAT DEMONSTRATES WISDOM. IT IS ABOUT A GIANT TRUCK THAT GETS STUCK UNDER AN OVERPASS. THE TRUCK WAS TOO TALL AND TOO BIG FOR THE AVAILABLE CLEARANCE. THE POLICE THEN CALLED OUT THE BEST, THE BRIGHTEST AND THE MOST EXPENSIE ENGINEERS IN THE CITY TO TRY TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO SHOULD BE DONE. THEY DISCUSS THE ISSUE AMONG THEMSELVES. THEY RACKED THEIR BRAINS FOR HOURS. BUT STILL THEY SIMPLY COULDN’T FIGURE OUT HOW TO REMOVE THAT GIANT TRUCK WITHOUT DAMAGING THE FREEWAY ABOVE. IT ALL SEEMED SO COMPLICATED. THEN A SMALL BOY, ABOUT SEVEN YEARS OLD, WALKED UP TO THE POLICEMEN AND TUGGED ON ONE OF THEIR PANTS LEGS. EXCUSE ME SIR, THE LITTLE BOY SAID IN A RESPECTFUL TONE. WHY DON’T YOU JUST LET THE AIR OF THE TIRES??? OUT OF THE MOUTH OF A 7 YEARS OLD BOY, THE PROBLEM WAS SOLVED.

THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE MADE THE MOST MONEY, OR WHO HAVE BEEN THE MOST SUCCESSFUL IN THEIR CAREERS, ARE ESSENTIALLY NOT ALWAYS THE MOST INTELLIGENT OR THE MOST HIGHLY EDUCATED. THERE ARE PLENTY OF HARVARD GRADUATES WHO HAVE A VERY DIFFICULT TIME MAKING SIGNIFICANT MONEY, DESPITE THEIR INCREDIBLE EDUCATION. USUALLY THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE THE MOST MONEY AND WHO HAVE THE MOST FUN MAKING ALL THE MONEY ARE HIGHLY CREATIVE, HIGHLY MOTIVATED, HAVE GREAT INTUITION, SOLID GUT REACTIOINS AND INSTINCT AND THE ABILITY TO SPOT OPPORTUNITIES. ALL THESE QUALITIES STEM NOT SO MUCH FROM INTELLIGENCE BUT FROM WISDOM. THIS IS NOT AN ARGUMENT AGAINST FORMAL EDUCTION, OR AGAINST STANDARD INTELLIGENCE. YET IT’S IMPORTANT TO KNOW THAT WE DON’T NEED TO USE ANY LACK OF FORMAL EDUCATION AS SMMUNITION AGAINST OURSELVES. EDUCATION IS IMPORTANT AND HELPFUL. BUT NEVER LET ANYONE CONVINCE YOU THAT IF YOU AREN’T FORMALLY EDUCATED, THAT YOU ARE DOOMED TO BE A FAILURE – BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT.

ONE OF THE BEST WAY TO ACCESS OUR OWN WISDOM IS TO SIMPLY BELIEVE THAT IS DOES EXIST AND TO TOTALLY TRUST IN IT. ALWAYS KEEP A CLEAR KNOWING THAT A DEEPER, MORE INTELLIGENT TYPE OF THINKING – OUR WISDOM – IS ALWAYS AVAILABLE.

5 secrets for success

2008-08-28T00:58:00.000-07:00

The five major philosophies that I've been following throughout my life are as follows.These theories according to me are a must to be successful (THE MOST SUCCESSFUL) in life. Of course these are not the lines that I've quoted, I'm not that big of a philosopher yet. They're from different places said by some unknown but valuable gems as philosophers.
Well, they're...................
(1) IT IS NEVER TOO LATE TO START AGAIN

(2) WELL BEGUN IS HALF DONE

(3) EVEN A 1000 MILE'S RACE BEGINS WITH A SINGLE STEP

(4) RACES ARE WON IN THE LAST FEW STEPS

(5) IF YOU "BELIEVE" IT "THEN", YOU CAN DO IT

These are the most inspiring and the most motivating lines I've ever known.And, I've always been very sure for one thing...."Whatever you can think of---YOU can DO that", and this "whatever" includes anything one can think of.
Suppose you have a 100% confidence that you can do whatever you taken up to or thought of, then definitely you can achieve whatever you've aimed for. Being very specific here I want to say that if howsoever you have even a trace of the "NOT GONNA WORK" type of thought anywhwre in your mind then my dear!!! You've lost it like a common man does.
But......if you happen to manage not to think of the negative part SOMEHOW, then, no one, not even GOD will dare to stop you STEP forward the step you've started to take. As an instance, if I can think that I'll pass in a subject in an exam.....and that thought is 100% strong, then, there's 0% chance for me to fail.
This is because whatever a human being is not being able to think of, CANNOT BE DONE.

This means that if a person somehow manages to think that a TIME MACHINE is possible, and if he thinks of it as 100% possible and nowhere in his mind comes (not even .001%) that "it maynot be....", then definitely this means............................

"THE TIME MACHINE IS COMING SOON"

Note: And that 100% confidence in anyone is exactly the perfect and should not be misunderstood as OVERCONFIDENCE

An Expression to Love

2008-08-26T00:58:00.000-07:00

We are moving around different spheres related to our capabilities.But have we ever imagined the definition of love?what is love?Why people do love actually?What they do when they are in love?I got some answers experineces through my life.I got hurt when poor peoples are in trouble from childhood.It means i have feelings for them & that is love.But the most difficult love is for opposite sex.If you are true to your love then you must endure pain.Love to opposite sex is nothing but a strong feelings that can't be controlled & full of huge emotions.We need a extremely private one who can share our feelings and who can take care us and so we make love.When we are in love we share feelings,do sex with emotions,we take care each other.Now the thing I wanna tell that I have a one too whom I love tremendously,whom I care extremely.But what I get from her?I get nothing if i don't give anything.If I give 90% she give 10%.If i give 0% she also giv 0% but still she loves me?I am confused.is this possilble?can any one love other without showing 1st response from her end?I am searching & searching but finding no answers?What is the base of a relation,is this time or behavior,if both then which one is storng?I have experienced it too but still finding no answer.I am getting everything from my lover,her body,her time,her every thing but always I have to knock for those,is that love?Have I got her mind actually?What should one do when he feels that he always take 10 steps for his love and on the contrary if he feels that his lover does not feel it or disagree to take 1st step always or his lover always compromises not loves actually?

The total summary is love is not so simple as we think. It is nothing but a complex one. If you feel natural love and be honest then you must endure pain.This is what I experienced and still experiencing.

What is Yoga?

2008-08-21T00:57:00.000-07:00

Yoga is an age old discipline which has become very relevant in the modern world. Before we dump it as old fashioned or claim it to be of the spiritual world, fit for only rishis and maharshis, we have to ask ourselves the question What is yoga?
Yoga is not simple physical exercise and one does not have to sweat it out like jogging or push ups. We are going away from this world of rush and hurry when we are on the path of yoga. Yoga brings us back the peace that we have lost in the rat race. It gives us the mental peace that no other practice can give.
We are going after healthy foods, relaxation centres and religious prayers in the hope that they will give us a little peace. Yoga works both externally as well as internally. The exercises of Yoga, when done slowly and gently makes one aware of the 'prana' that flows through us. It is our life-giver, the breath that sustains us.
By controlling this vital breath man can control his mind,his emotions and be free from any worry that beset him. Once we have enjoyed the real fruits of yoga, then nothing in the world can stop us from embracing it forever. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yoga

Meaning of success

2008-08-17T00:56:00.000-07:00

First of all i would say success has different meaning for different people. Every human person has his own definition of success. For some person success means acquiring all the physical luxury of life. For some success means leaving all the physical luxury for the spiritual gain. For some, success means reaching the top post of a multinational & for some it may be helping the most competent man to reach the top post of the same organization. For some success means, living life never compromising on the values & beliefs which they believe in & for some it means breaking all the values & belief for getting whatever they want. List goes on. As far as I am concerned success is not about winning or loosing. It''s also not about getting anything or I would put it more appropriately acquiring anything because i know one hard fact of the law of nature, what is today will not be tomorrow. So for me dear friend success means a temporary phase of ecstasy which regularly comes in short intervals in small phases. Like when i write something & somebody likes it, it’s a success for me. I feel successful when i give some advice to my friend & they get benefit out of it. I feel successful when I find everybody around me accepting injustice for the fear of repercussion & I garner enough courage to resist it. I think success can never be a permanent phase, for everybody it comes in different forms in different times. I have seen lot of my friends cribbing about not very successful in life & I try to explain them DO NOT COUNT SUCCESS AS ONE BIG PERMANENT HAPPENING, COUNT YOUR MOMENTS WHEN YOU WERE HAPPY, WHEN YOU FEEL ELATED, WHEN YOUR HEART WAS FILLED WITH JOY, WHEN YOU FEEL VERY PROUD OF YOUR ACHIEVMENTS HOWEVER LITTLE THEY WERE.The moments of success would be in thousands & feeling of failure will be very few. So with these findings are we all not successful. I think we all are.

Science and Ethics

2008-08-07T00:54:00.000-07:00

After the onset of the Modern Age, once modern science began to set in, it did not take long before humanity began to wonder about the ethical responsibilities of scientists towards their discoveries and their derived applications. Many researchers consider science as completely neutral; therefore, scientists cannot be responsible nor should they bear any liability for the technology they create and much less for its application.

On the other hand, some feel scientists are responsible not only as such but also as a segment of the society in which they carry out their work.
Modern science (techno-science) receives constant praise for the benefits it continually provides, whereas neither eventual failures nor harmful applications ever appear to derive from scientific work.

No human activity, not even science, is exempt from ethical responsibilities. Scientists therefore are accountable for each decision they make, more so if freedom exists to select from several options. They should be liable for both the beneficial as well as the harmful consequences.

The Brain Dump

2008-08-03T00:53:00.000-07:00

This is a conflicting time of the year, one that always baffles me......I find it amazing the amount of people who wait for the New year to resolve to make changes within their lives. Then again many find it strange that I introspect as much as I do. In all honesty I wasn't always so devoted to my well being (elements of the mind and heart melded together). Some would call the time you would take to delve into your psyche a waste...... Years ago I used to dump whatever I was feeling, thinking, rationalizing as deep down inside as I could. I figured if you buried it deep enough, it would stay buried. Unfortunately our humanity doesn't allow us that luxury for long. I ended up having an overload of memories, pain, sorrow - flow into my daily life. Quite frankly there was no more room in the inn upstairs, or within me........My storehouse closed down....almost permanently. I remember doing the resolutions, promising myself the changes I would bring about, the dreams that would finally come true. Perhaps it could be said: I set my goals too high, I dreamed too big, I wasn't ready for life and didn't have a clue where to begin.....the list goes on for excuses and reasons of the pitying sort. The reality is our bodies are not meant to be dumps. We need to feel our pain, our joy, our failures as well as our successes in life. What I'm trying to say is welcome the New Year, but make your life a resolution; not just one day of the year when it seems appropriate. I find these days I clean the cobwebs from the recesses of my mind quite frequently and allow who I am to shine through. I tend to my hopes and dreams like a gardener, I weed the disillusions and distraught from time to time. Yet nourish and water my hopes and love giving it the enrichment it needs to grow. Most importantly I quiet the noise inside my head, so I can listen and truly hear what resides in my heart. So this year my friends , don't let your mind become a dumping ground for who you are. Open up the doors and allow that spirit that is you, see the world through crystal clear eyes and open wounds. We will always find pain and sorrow to be a part of our lives. It's our choice if those are the only things we ever feel. I hope you choose to allow all the love, peace, sincerity, compassion and good will that comes with it as well a room in your inn.......You can never feel too much, love too much, hurt too much, it's a given with your humanity. It's your choice how you live with it, in misery or acceptance.

Appearance and Reality

2008-07-29T00:49:00.000-07:00

In daily life, people tend to make contradictions about what is real and what is apparent. For example, when I look, out the window, at the sun, in my little knowledge I will tend to distinguish between its real size and its apparent size. Also, looking at a table, one will tell its real color under standard conditions and its apparent color given some certain conditions. Then the question is how do we know what is ultimately real and what is merely apparent? We then find out that it is hard to believe what we simply see, feel, touch or hear.
According to Bertrand Russell, certain things on a closer scrutiny are filled with many contradictions. Therefore the quest for certainty has to start from present experiences. Now, doubt, and our personal experiences and that of others leads to one of the greatest problems of philosophy, the real and the unreal. The quest is to know what objects are, and what they seam to be. Russell stated that although different people see different colors when looking at the same table owing to their positions, we can not straight up say that those that see it in a different way are not right. In essence, when we tend to seek reality, we should not be objective about the whole idea. But then, some will conclude that the table has no specific color, and in the long run say that the table never really existed. The variations in the way people see colors, shapes textures and objects as the immediately become aware of is a sensation. Thus one’s view will be different from the other. Thus if the table really exists, it has a relationship between its physical structure and the sensation about it. Some philosophers attribute the existence of “physical objects” as ideas of the mind, not of one man or God but of a collection of souls in the universe.
Now the question of whether there exists a real table has been answered by some philosophers. Berkeley and Leibniz admit that there is a real table, but while Berkeley says it is ideas in the mind of God, Leibniz admit that it is a collection of ideas from different souls. Thus the differences in the way we perceive things depend on each single individual. Thus appearance is some sort of a sign to reality which lies behind the appearance.
In my opinion, I think that there is reality behind every thing that appears to be. Just for instance let’s consider when you stand waist-deep in a swimming pool. You will notice that you’re a legs appear shorter and fatter than they really are, and may seem to bend. But we know that our legs are straight and not as fat as they seem to appear in the pool. Thus, there must be something that influences such appearance, in this case the water in the pool. Without this water, what we see is our normal and real legs. We know the “real” leg, and also know the apparent one as it appears inside the water in the pool. Therefore we cannot know the reality of objects from their appearances owing to the fact that certain conditions make them appear that way. We can tell of things as they appear to be, but not as the really are. Just as the popular saying, don’t judge a book by its cover; we cannot say that real objects are exactly the way seem to be. Looks can be deceiving, because they are not entirely what they are. If we can look at something with our naked eye and see a different thing as we see with the microscope, it vividly shows that there is more to what the ordinary eye (and even the microscope) can see as to the way reality is.

Are You Really Angry Now?

2008-07-25T00:46:00.000-07:00

Anger is one of the most common emotions shown by a human being.Losing temper can be because of a number of reasons.The exact definition of anger can not be provided in few words because it depends upon the environment either physcological or behavioural.If you are angry ,control yourself and think what are you going to do ?Sometimes anger could be our dangerous enemy.For instance, we have heard that anger took lives of many people.Its a momentary factor spreading through our neurons in the activation process of brain. So anger can be disastrous,it is already proved that losing temper is harmful to health.It damages the normal functioning of various nerves and decreases the quality of blood pressures.So,try your best not to lose your temper for minor reasons.

Take it easy ....always remember that.Without any specific reason many people easily loses temper..think once again it can be the symptoms of various mental problems or high blood pressure or even the periodic causes of some diseases.Its a common phenomena to be angry but if you are alert about the matter yourself ,plenty of complex problems can be solved without any difficulty.

Thus never loose your temper but if you do some early precautions are here to minimize or prevent your anger:

* Make a reverse count ,for instance,10 to 1 or 100 to 1 according the measure of anger and the reasons to be angry.

* Take a deep breathe 2 to 3 times and make yourself relief physically and mentally.

* Go in open air and stroll for a while.

* Who is the responsible of your anger,forget about it and try to figure out, how he or she helped you or did great things to you on past times.

* Think positive immediately about the factor that is responsible for your anger.

* Wash your face with cold water,splash water on your eyes.

* Drink cold drink or your favourite drinks.

* Make sure was there any fault of yours?Try to figure out the reason of your anger.

* Be cool and calm.

* Smile first ,then laugh..forget about the incident.

* Do not throw things or smash nearby stuffs during your anger period.

* Never harm others physically or call bad words,neither yell.

* Make a conclusion that you are normal and try to patch up the disputes.

* Vow ,you'll not be a angry person now in future.

* If still you couldn't make yourself cool,take a shower and make all of your anger flow away.

* Make yourself fresh and listen soft music,think about flowing springs,green forests and chirping birds.

* Play with kids,try to find out the meaning of their innocent ,beautiful smile.

* Take a sleep for few hours.

* Now also if you are feeling uneasy and your anger is raising its level,visit some psychiatrist soon.

Old Seven Wonders Of The World

2008-07-20T04:01:00.000-07:00

OLD SEVEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD

THE COLOSSUS OF RHODES:

The colossus was the shortest lived of the seven wonders of the ancient world. Completed in 282 B.C. after taking twelve years to build, the Colossus of Rhodes was felled by an earthquake that snapped the statue off at the knees a mere 56 years later. the towering figure made of stone and iron with an outer skin of bronze represented the Greek sun God Helios, the island''s patron god. It looked out from Mandraki Harbor on the Mediterranean island of Rodos, although it is no longer believed to have straddled, the harbor entrance as often shown in illustrations.
The Colossul stood about 110 feet (33m) tall, making it the tallest known statue of the ancient world. It was erected to celebrate the unification of the island''s three city states, which successfully resisted a long siege by the Antigonids of Macedonia.

THE LIGHT HOUSE OF ALEXANDRA:

The light house was the only ancient wonder that had a practical use, serving as a beacon for ships in the dangerous watyres of the Egyptian port city of Alexandria, now called EI Iskandariya. Constructed on the small island of Pharos between 285 and 247 B.C., the building was the world''s tallest for some time with a height of 384 feet (117m)
The light house was operated using fire at night and polished bronze mirrors that reflected the sun during the day. It is said that the light could be seen for more than 35 miles (50kms ) out to sea.
The huge structure towerred over the Mediterranean coast for more than 1500 years before bring seriously damaged by earthquakes in A.D. 1303 and 1323.

THE STATUE OF ZEUS:

The massive gold statue of the King of the Greek gods was built in honor of the original olympic games, which began in the ancient city of Olympia. The statue, completed by the classical sculptor Phidias around 432 B.C., sat on a jewel encrusted wooden throne inside a temple overlooking the city. The 40 foot (12m ) tall figure had a scepter in one hand and a small statue of the goddess of victory, NIKe, in the other-both made ivory and precious metals. The temple was closed when the olymoics were banned as a pagan practice in A.D. 391, after Christianity became the official religion of the Roman Empire.
The statue was eventually destroyed, although historians debate wether it perished with the temple or was moved to Constantinople ( Istanbul ) in Turkey and burned in a fire.

THE HANGING GARDENS IN BABYLON:

The hanging gardens are said to have stoos on the gates of the Euphrates river in modern day Iraq, although there is some doubt that wether they really existed. The Babylonian king Nebuchandnezzar II supposedly craeted the terraced gardens in 600 B.C. at his royal palace in the Mesopotamian desert. It is said that the gardens were made to please the King''s wife who missed the lush greenery of her homeland in the Medes, in what is now northern Iran. Archaelogists have yet to agree on the likely site of the hanging gardens but findings in the region that could be its remains include the foundations of a palace and a nearby vaulted building whith an irrigation well.
The most detailed description of the gardens come from Greek historians. There is no mention of them in ancient Babylonian records.

THE MAUSELEUM OF HALLCARNASSUS

The famous tomb at Halicarnassus now the city of Bodrum was built between 370 and 350 B.C. for King Mausolus of Caito, a region in the southwest of modern Turkey. Legend says that the King''s grieving wife Artemisia II had the tomb constructed as a memorial to their love. Mausolus was a satrap, or governor, in the Persian Empire, and his fabled tomb is the source of the word "mausoleum" The structure 120 feet (40m) long and 140feet (45m) tall. The tomb was most admired for its architectural beauty and splendor. the central burial chamber was decoratde in gold, while the exterior was adorned with ornate stone Friezes and sculptures created by four Greek artists. The mausoleum stood intact untill the early 15th century, when christian crusaders dismantled it for building material for a new castle. Some of the sculptures and frieze sections survived and can be seen today at the the British Museum in London, England.

THE TEMPLE OF ARTEMIS:

The great marble temple dedicated to the Greek goddess Artemis was compleated around 550 B.C. at Ephesus, near the modern day town of Selcuk in Turkey. In addition to its 120 columns, each standing 60 feet (20m) high, the temple was said to heve held many equisite art works, including bronze statues of the Amazons, a methical race of female warriors. A man named Herostratus reprtedly burned down the temple in 356 B.C. in an attempt to immortalize his name. After being restored the temple was destroyed by the Goths in A.D. 262 and again by the cgristians in A.D. 401 on the orders of St John Chrysostom, the archbishop of Constantinople (Istanbul). Today the temple''s foundation have been excavated and some of its columns re-erected.

Happiness and Your Health

2008-07-14T04:10:00.000-07:00

It''s easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life and lose sight of what makes you happy. Really happy. But making sure your happiness meter is giving optimal readings can provide many important health benefits.

What makes people happy?
Jump ahead to the quiz. Happy people have younger hearts, younger arteries, and a younger RealAge. Happy people recover more quickly from surgery, cope better with pain, have lower blood pressure, and have longer life expectancy than unhappy people.

Studies also suggest that happy people may have stronger immune systems—they''re less likely to get colds and flu viruses. And when they do, their symptoms tend to be mild.

Not surprisingly, happy people are better at looking after their health, too. When people''s happiness levels improve, so do their health behaviors. They exercise more, wear sunscreen, and go for regular checkups.

How to get there
So everyone wants to be happy, and the benefits are clearly plentiful. But researchers have discovered that people aren''t always great at predicting what will make them happy. If it''s long-term happiness you''re after, you may need to learn a few new tricks. Take the time to read this Article on the latest happiness research and find out whether you''re doing all you can for a healthier, younger, happier you.

What is happiness?
We all know when we''re happy and when we''re not. But ask a roomful of people what makes them happy and you''re likely to get a wide range of responses, from "watching the sunset" or "spending time with good friends" to "finding a great shoe sale" or "winning the office football pool."

Defining happiness is no simple feat.

In an effort to help narrow the definition, researchers have devised a series of questionnaires to measure life satisfaction, positive mood, and subjective well-being. Some scientists are even beginning to use brain imaging to better understand the physiology of happiness. And economists have jumped on the happiness bandwagon, too, hoping to calculate the value of happiness within a sociopolitical context.

So what have they discovered? What makes for a happy life?

It''s only partly your genes
Although your level of happiness is not entirely predetermined by your genes, genes do play a part, just as they play a part in your general health. Some researchers estimate that as much as 40% to 50% of a person''s capacity for happiness may be genetically predetermined. And although that means some lucky people may start off with a greater propensity for happiness, it''s no guarantee they''ll lead a charmed life. Fortunately, evidence suggests that even the gloomiest of us can learn to be happier.

What are the Benefits of Debt Relief Educational Services?

2008-07-07T04:08:00.000-07:00

If you want to reduce or clear your credit card debts, you may want to
engage yourself with an educational services debt relief programs. You
will be educated on how to manage, restructure, extend, and negotiate your payments with your credit card company. These
services provide you the knowledge to be able to achieve the best debt
relief for your financial stability. They have employees that provide
educational services on how you will be able to achieve a debt free
status. You will also learn the different strategies on how you can
empower yourself with the knowledge of becoming financially secure in
the future. Now
that you are equipped with the right education provided by an
educational service debt relief, you will learn how to become
financially independent and stay out of debt. You may find yourself
with a bad credit score. You may find many ways on how you can improve
your financial status. Here are some things that you will be able to
apply in case you encounter problems in settling your debts due to a
bad credit score or high interest rates on your credit cards.

Measures to Reduce Global Warming

2008-07-02T03:56:00.000-07:00

Global warming is a serious natural threat all living species face today. However efforts are being made all over the globe to reduce its effects on all living creature. Some of them are listed below: We should encourage everyone to adopt them in our daily lives.

a. Solar aid

Use solar energy and conserve the environment.

A project has been introduced to promote solar power in remote communities, reducing their dependency on wood and charcoal and giving them an income.

Under this project people will test a new solar powered water pump that will allow families to access clean water for drinking, washing and irrigation.

Poor communities in Malawi use kerosene for lighting, which is highly toxic. This project will introduce clean, affordable solar lighting into rural homes.

This project will create jobs for the poorest people in Tanzania, and bring solar power to local communities and school children.

b. Save Coastal trees

Sempervirens Fund

They aim in preserving natural character of California’s Santa Cruz Mountains. Trees are grown to bloom and no destruction is encouraged. Donations form a part of the financial requirements.

c. Controlled Industrialization

Industrialization has helped develop the entire world but now the extent of this revolution is harming life and nature. Countries resorting to industrial growth should do so in a controlled manner.

d. Education

Children are computer savvy today. They enjoy games and sports that educate them about global warming issues along with entertaining them. Kids are fully aware of the harmful effects of this problem and are taught how to reduce them. The cartoons and animated characters, which the kids look up to guide them through the issue.

Moreover, the air pollution control efforts are further deteriorating the conditions of global warming. A universal effort is the immediate answer’ to this condition.

TOLERANCE

2008-06-28T00:55:00.000-07:00

Tolerance could be define in many ways but the best way to define it depends majorly on how it happiers to individually,to me it means being understanding,caring and ability to ignore the mistakes of others,for example people clamour for good health,war against poverty and the develop nation still maginalize the developing country by extracting there natural resources and use it to develop their own country, thousand of people were being deported on a daily basis because they were illegal immigrant,yet the develop nations refuse to tollerate them into their system........well is better everybody learn how to tollerate each one another into our system because you the person you dont want to help today might turn to be your mother,brother or family

Travel to seven continents tag

2008-06-27T03:28:00.000-07:00

~Begin Copy~

Rules :
1. Start Copy from "Begin Copy" until "End Copy".
2. Put your blog's name and url write in which continent you live, add the country you live in. Example : My Imaginary Travels (Netherlands)
3. Leave your url post in here and I'll add you to the Master List.
4. Please help spread this tag by tagging your friends as much as you can.
5. Don't play unfair! If you have more than 1 blog, you can participate all your blogs for this tag. BUT you will have to post this tag to all your blogs as well. So, please. Don't cheat!
6. Please come back again to copy the update of the master list, often. This process will help new participants to get the same gains as the first participants.
7. Don't forget to use the banner at your post, you can save as or you can just copy the code in here.

Master List :
A. Asia : 1. Moms... Check Nyo (Philippines) 2. Aeirin's Collections (Philippines) 3. Jenny and Belle(Philippines) 4. Hailey's Beats and Bits (Philippines) 5. Appleofmyeyes(Saudi Arabia) 6. Deranged Insanity (Philippines) 7. PROJECT HEAVY TRAFFIC (Singapore) 8. Rooms of My Heart (Indonesia) 9. Blessings and Beyond (Philippines) 10. lancerlord (Singapore) 11. allinkorea (Korea) 12. kimchiland (Korea) 13. korean food (Korea) 14. idealpinkrose (Korea) 15. Pinay Mommy Online (Philippines) 16. Momhood Moments (Philippines) 17. Business Mars (Philippines) 18. Maiylah’s Snippets (Philippines) 19. Picture Clusters (Philippines) 20. My Wanderings (Philippines) 21. Hit-or-Miss (Philippines) 22. Life Quest (Philippines) 23. FunFierceFabulous (Phils) 24. and Life Goes On for... (Philippines) 25. Moments of Colours (Philippines) 26. Making sense… (somehow) (Philippines) 27. Day To Day (Philippines) 28. My Happy Place 29. Me and Mine (Japan) 30. Little Peanut (Japan) 31. Creative In Me (Japan) 32. Pea in a Pod (Japan) 33. A Slice of Life (Phils) 34. Jenny Said So (Phils) 35. Live it Up... (Philippines) 36. A Sweet Taste Of Life (Philippines) 37. Through The Rain (Philippines) 38. Sugarmagnolias (Japan) 39. ParentZine育兒好好玩 (Singapore) 40. We are Family (PH) 41. Reference Notes (Hong Kong) 42. The Sweet Life 43. A Great Pleasure (Malaysia) 44. LadyJava's Lounge (Malaysia) 45. LadyJava Life's Pages (Malaysia) 46. Being Woman (Malaysia), 47. Cat Tales (Malaysia) 48. Make Money Online (Malaysia) 49. LadyJava's Food Paradise (Malaysia) 50.Alanzain-home decor world (Malaysia)51.Let's talk-everything in one space (Malaysia)52. your turn

B. Australia : 1. Reflexes (Australia) 2. Emcee 3. Outback-Pinay 4. Collect and Connect (Australia) 5. your turn

C. Afrika : 1. your turn

D. North Amerika : 1. Simple Life, Simply Me (USA) 2. Pinaymama's Diary (USA) 3. 3 Garnets & 2 Sapphires (United States) 4.Traipsey Turvey (USA) 5. Dabawenyako (USA) 6. Icelog (USA) 6. The Misadventures of an Ordinary Housewife (USA) 7. It Is Nap Time (US) 8.A Mother's Journal (USA) 9. Journey And Journal [USA] 10. Life is good and beautiful (USA) 11. Tasteful Voyage (USA) 12. Jenny's Wandering Thoughts (USA) 13. Mom Knows Everything (Canada) 14. Filipino love stories (USA) 15. A Mom's Note (USA) 16. Life with the Two Crazy Dogs 17. BLOGSILOG (USA) 18. Juliana’s World ( New York, USA) 19. your turn

E. South Amerika : 1. your turn

F. Europe : 1. My Imaginary Travels (Netherlands) 2. Juliana's Site (Netherlands) 3. Picturing of Life (Netherlands) 4. SuperMae (Portugal) 5. The Callalily Space (The Netherlands) 6. Portia (UK) 7. Daily Grind (Germany) 8. Amel's Realm (Finland) 9. your turn

G. Antarctica : 1. your turn

~ End Copy ~

Are You Aware to Your Future?

2008-06-25T03:55:00.000-07:00

Its very sad to know that many youth nowadays are not really focusing or not being aware to their future.They are just wasting their time with nothing- they don't studies or even though they studies somehow, they don't pay much attention with that. Some don't like to WORK also, instead they just do non-sense thing,they just consume most of their time staying in the house,watching television, play games in the internet and so on.. These are the daily routines they do in their lives. They don't even plan for their future.Because of these, what they give to their parents is always a headache.

Now for how long you will be like these? I hope you will not say FOREVER.. Here are some of the reasons why teens are not aware to their future..

***MY PARENTS HAVE A STABLE JOB. I DON'T NEED TO BE WORRY.

- Don't depend on your parents. Time will come that you will build and have your own family too.Especially if you're a guy, you will be the head of the family and you will be responsible for providing and giving the best and wonderful future to your own family someday.

*** EVERYDAY I EAT 3X A DAY..AND THAT'S IMPORTANT..

- Huh!That's the reasoning of a lazy person. Hey some on! Don't you have a dream? Are you really contented in that kind of daily routine in your life? Change your personality. Grow up!

*** I'M UNDERGRADUATE. I TRY APPLYING FOR A JOB MANY TIMES. NO JOBS FIT FOR ME..

- But life doesn't ends in there. You must try and try until you succeed.Don't give up. Always think positive. A positive person achieved positive in life. Always condition and set your mind. If you always set to your mind, ("I REALLY NEED TO HAVE JOB, I AM SURELY GET THIS JOB") then it will be yours. Try to be patient and BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.

*** UNTIL NOW,I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT I REALLY WANT IN MY LIFE OR DO IN MY LIFE...

- Normally, teens experienced this kind of situation.. They really don't know what exactly they really want in their life especially in their future..These are the things you must do..

^ TALK TO YOURSELF..

(WHAT IS MY MOTIVATION IN LIFE? WHAT WILL BE ME AFTER 5-10 YEARS?)

- I f you imagine, " I will be a successful doctor after 5-10 years.." Well,that's a good sign because you are about to start to discover what you dream to be.. Now the next thing that you will do is to do something to it. Focus on your study. Study hard. Always think of your dream to be, it will help you to get inspired and always think "YOU CAN" . a SUCCESSFUL PERSON are those who are positive thinker and don't ever ever QUIT..

So now start building your own future..As much as possible, build the best future that you can be.. Remember the only person that will help you to achieved the best future that you can have is YOURSELF.. A positive mind, determination, being hardworking will lead you to SUCCESS..

Culture Article Review

2008-06-17T03:52:00.000-07:00

Can a Country preserve its culture nowadays when subject to outside influences?

Culture is a way of life particular to a group of people. It is the sum total of their traditions in the field of literature, religion and languages. These traditions have developed over centuries and in some cases, over thousands of years and consequently cannot be destroyed. Of course, the impact of foreign influence can make a dent in them but basically they remain the same. But when too much foreign influence threatens to adulterate a particular culture, there is a reaction of self preservation which saves it from being swept off its feet.

For example, some twenty or twenty-five years ago, when the countries of western Europe seemed like being swamped by an influx of immigrants from Africa and Asia, the reactions of its inhabitants was very sharp. They insisted that their political representatives should put a stop to immigration and voted out office any party who did not agree. The reason generally given was those immigrants having different customs, religions and traditions were a danger to the survival of European Culture. The result was that, despite the opposition of a liberal segment of Western society and of its social and religious organisations, immigration was drastically cut down. So doing this, the Westerners could preserve their way of life that is their culture.

But the question, nowadays, is how long such prohibitions or laws, moral or otherwise, can safeguard a particular culture in face of constant pressure from outside. First of all, no man is an island and no country can afford to keep its door closed against foreign contact or influence. In these days of easy world communications, where one can travel from one corner of the world to another, in not more than a week, in these days where nations rely very much on trade with the outside world and tourism to promote world fellowship, it is very difficult to live in an ivory tower. Regular contacts between the heads of different governments, international seminars or forums, mammoth gatherings. Languages are no barrier. Many people speak two languages, theirs and another one generally a widely spoken language like English or French. Quite a few even speak three or four languages, for having learnt them at college and read all about culture, the background to the languages they are out to study.

It is clear therefore that the walls of division and exclusion are slowly falling apart and that the world is really becoming a small place indeed where people of different cultures will have to learn to live side by side and to give and take in every sphere of human activity. The idea should be not to preserve but to share. If a particular culture has something in it that is permanent and elevating no other cultural currents but, basically, it will remain the same. For example, British culture has had to face many invasions and many outside influences but it has blossomed whether in the U.K, in America, Australia or Canada. This is because the British culture can be compared to a plant that grows in all climes and is quick to adapt to basically local conditions.

Consequently, a country can and should be to preserve its culture provided it is determined to safeguard it as the French or the English do and are proud to do. In the modern context when outside influences are increasing day by day this pride in one’s culture must be shown not only in words but also in deed to safeguard it against the intrusion of cheap culture stuff from abroad and propagate its ideas and values by signing of Cultural Agreements. Developing countries should follow the example of India which is spending large sums of money to organise festivals abroad to bring home to both foreigners and Indians themselves that if a country were to preserve its culture against foreign influences they should be ready to explain or interpret it to the world. As long as one sincerely believes in one’s way of life one should without fear or favour stand by it. There is no better way to preserve it and to remain true to one’s Cultural Heritage

How to Choose Perfume

2008-06-07T03:49:00.000-07:00

perfume or cologne might prove heavy on the pocket. But it gives the best value for money compared to other packaged fragrances like deodorants, body sprays and eau de cologne.

First, they have the longest staying power. Just a whiff is enough to keep you smelling great for hours.

They also lend relief when you are crammed in public transport system!

"I find myself clambering for just a whiff of Dior's Dunes or Carrera, so that the fragrance can overpower less enchanting bodily odours," says Shirish, a collegian who braves the Mumbai local trains every day, and is saving up for his first bottle of cologne.

It is going to be Polo Sport by Ralph Lauren for Shirish.

~ Perfume etiquette

It is politically incorrect to drench yourself in perfume just because you like the fragrance.

If you do, your humongous cloud of vapour will follow you wherever you go, pierce every nostril in the vicinity and leave people choking on the smell for hours after!

Be a little altruistic. Try not to infringe on another's personal space.

Etiquette expert Dr Tushar Guha shares some subtle hints on how to wear your perfume right:

i. Choose your perfume with care depending on the occasion.

ii. A cocktail party, a meeting with one or two people, a day at the office, a corporate event, these occasions demand a little sophistication. So go with a subtle scent that does not jerk an unsuspecting nostril out of its peaceful reverie.

iii. But if you want to make a splash at a wedding, a party or on a night of clubbing, go in for something stronger, but nothing too loud, unless a 'loud' image is what you really want to project!

iv. We all want to be accepted and your choice of perfume should complement what you stand for.

Apply it with finesse

i. While applying your perfume, don't splash it all over your clothes. Apply it behind your earlobes, the upper sides of your palms and on the right and left side of your neck. These are your pulse points and the fragrance will sustain for a longer period. Besides, you won't soil your clothes.

ii. Even though you might have seen it in the movies, do not rub your wrists together after spraying on perfume. This reduces the effect of the top layer of perfume.

iii. If you like a little flamboyance, do it the filmi way, by spraying some into the air and walk through it. Now, you are soaking in your favourite scent!

iv. Keep the spray away from your nostrils, else you might inhale the chemicals. This could lead to breathing trouble.

v. How much should you apply? One round of application to all the pulse points will do. Unless you perspire a lot, in which case, you could go in for round two.

vi. Many people love to spray perfume everywhere, including their hair, handbag, cushions and sheets.

Well, go ahead and indulge yourself. But when it comes to spraying it on to your silk sari or tie, restrain yourself, else you will end up ruining your best silk!

~ Shopping tips

According to Vilobha Vijay Joshi, perfumer with International Flavours and Fragrances, and a 'nose' to be reckoned with, the same fragrance will smell different on two people as the body heat and inherent body odours are different.

So please make sure you test your perfume on yourself and not your friend. Else your friend will smell like lily of the valley, while you could emerge smelling like durian!

Have the Perfect Man or Perfect Women?

2008-06-02T03:48:00.000-07:00

Believe what the perfect man, or the perfect women no have. To some mans the wonen is some difficut of understand. He said what the women is strange. Have topics very important to she, what no are to we. But, believe what the opposing too happen. To me, the perfectly is in eye of who see. No believe what duty search the '''' perfect man'''' to married, but the our perfect man. To some women is very important what the man be kind and romantic. But, belive what duty search our right man (romantic and kind man have too). Although the important to an couple is what learn respect and love , because the together of marriage never is same at time of relationship and engagement, she is very difficult when appear the problem. Every have hand without lose your person or your be, but adapt one the another. Believe what every we duty search the "our perfect man" to be happy whit the love man.

Theocracy and Democracy:the Government and the Masses.

2008-05-30T03:46:00.000-07:00

INTRODUCTION:

Theocracy and democracy are two distinct forms of governments which can be found in present day countries. Theocracy has a more religious aspect to it where as democracy has a more rational angle. Taking into account important historical incidents such as the Iranian Revolution one can further investigate into the matter. The advantages and disadvantages of both forms of governments exist. It is important to weigh these in an unbiased manner so as to arrive on a conclusion. It is evident that democracy is more widely found and accepted and that most developed nations of the world have a democratic government, however, this does not imply that it is free from sins or that it is superior to a theocratic government. All pros and cons have to be analysed before one draws a conclusion.

UNDERSTANDING THEOCRACY AND DEMOCRACY:

Theocracy and democracy are two completely different kinds of governments which are found in present day countries. Theocracy is a state where the country and its people are ruled by a group of people who are believed to be guided by the almighty. Thus it implies that in a theoretical state the ruling body is chosen on religious basis. Democracy is however a completely different scenario. In a democratic state the governing body is chosen by a system of elections.

ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES OF THEOCRACY:

Theocracy has always been plagued by a number of sins. In Islamic countries where theocracy is prevalent, it is observed that a number of negative norms have developed. Here the rights to women have been curtailed to a large extent. According to Zalman (2004) in Islamic countries such as Afghanistan the right to women are either narrowed down using religion as an excuse or not mentioned at all. They are deprived of basic rights such as education and welfare. They are considered lower than men and often subject to a lot of domestic abuses and violence. Beauchamp (2006) stated that “Theocrats, Christian or Islamic, view the world through the same condemnatory prism-and see sinners who must be punished.” There are very few positives about such a regime. It is observed in some instances that there is a high level of morality and social welfare. This is because the people tend to become very religious and pious.

THE IRANIAN REVOLUTION:

In the year 1979, the Shah’s rule ended and Iran became a theocratic state. This was the result of a mass revolution against the existing regime. Iran was previously ruled by a dictator but after the revolution the power shifted into the hands of a group of mollahs. They were religious priests who were believed to have been guided by Allah. This was indeed a surprise as Iran’s government was considered to be one of the most stable governments in the Middle East. The new theocratic government proved to be worse than the existing dictatorship. The state was infested with sins like violence and bloodshed and the people perceived religion as the sole motive of existence. As a result of which a number of social as well as economic changes came about which showed unfavorable characteristics.

NEGATIVE ASPECTS OF DEMOCRACY:

Government officials in numerous democratic countries have been found guilty of unjust atrocities. They have been caught red handed accepting or demanding bribe, passing bills or laws which are against common welfare and other such incidents. In democratic countries like India and Bangladesh the scenario is even worse. Here the common people are threatened by hired thugs and miscreants to vote for particular political parties. Things such as booth capturing and violence do not allow the elections to proceed in a smooth way. Often because of such incidents there is an unjust outcome to the elections. At the time of elections, representatives spend huge amounts of money on publicity and social propaganda; this money could well be used for more constructive purposes. They also make false and misleading promises to the masses and cheat them to attain their votes.

DEMOCRACY AND DEVELOPMENT:

Unlike in a theocratic country, the people in a democratic country are free to express their views and are free to do as per their choice. This allows opportunity for growth and innovations and people in such countries have fewer burdens as compared to people of theocratic countries. Laws and norms are rationally devised and do not have a religious angle to it. There are free markets for goods and services which encourages trade and commerce. The state is secular and does not discriminate on the basis of religion, caste, sex or creed. There is a sense of equality and there is equal opportunity.

.

CONCLUSION:

However it is not so difficult to conclude that with the examples of theocratic countries such as Iran, theocracy as compared to democracy is not a very progressive form of government. It tends to curtail basic human rights and can be misleading in the name of religion. It has its advantages as well but they are few and there is no real positive effect. In the end one can conclude that the argument is not that which of the two is best but which of the two is least worst.

Make Money FAST and EASY.

2008-05-30T02:34:00.000-07:00

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I received a call from my sponsor because he had received an email from me promoting a different opportunity, and he took the time to call me, ask what I was doing, and then provided me with his link to .WS which I viewed right away. When I saw the movie and the fact it costs only $10 a month, I was amazed. I immediately registered for the free trial and went to work. I finished my first 30 days with 102 people, and am more excited today than I was when I first saw the opportunity. I have found my business grows in direct proportion to the number of people that watch the movie. Therefore, I ask a lot of people each day to watch the movie and give me their opinion. About 50% of those that watch the movie join the business. Thanks to GDI management for the finest opportunity on the internet today.

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How to Save a Coin From Your Shopping

2008-05-27T03:39:00.000-07:00

Money is hard to come by, majority of people in the third world survive on less than a dollar per day. Poor living standards and lack of jobs has seen a good number of professionals moving away from their countries in search of greener pasture overseas. It is however appropriate for individuals to learn a few tricks on how to safely utilize their hard earned money.

Just as the saying goes “you wont have problem with your dollar if you can save the coin”. Unplanned shopping may just drain one out of a long time savings.

Several financial institutions have come up with credit and debit cards to help their clients use money which they may not have at the moment. Depending on the banking institution, credit card attracts an interest rate. According to experts the cards are convenient and helps one when broke but it is advisable to avoid it when shopping “it may lure one to do unnecessary shopping” studies indicate that people tend to spend more money when shopping on credit than on cash.

When doing a monthly, weekly or annual shopping, one should draw a budget stating with the most urgently needed items, “ any extra money left should be channeled to other luxurious activities” it is proper to keep receipts from the supermarket for future reference.

In order to save more money from shopping, always draw a list before stepping into the market, avoid temptations and buy only what had earlier been planned for. In most supermarkets, temptations to indulge in impulse buying is high, “some goods like chocolate, sweet, pen and batteries are strategically placed at the pay counter to lure unsuspecting customers'. It is advisable to do comparison in various shops to check out on the prices.

Knowing what various shops offer enable one to identify where to get a particular product at an affordable rate, like in the stock market, shoppers should buy goods needed in bulk when the prices are low, 'to household items like furniture and electronics buying when there is an offer or auction helps in saving a coin”

Large stores order for their stock in bulk, they therefore get discount from their suppliers, such stores are known for offering goods at a reduced price, “it is important to know some of the employees in a supermarket at a personal level, “they may provide an information on goods which are available on offer”. Always avoid widely advertised goods they may have hidden side effects.

The Tale of Love and Madness Article

2008-05-27T03:37:00.000-07:00

A long time ago, before the world was created, virtues and vices floated around and were bored, not knowing what to do.

One day, all the vices and virtues had a meeting and declared that they were more bored than ever. Suddenly, Ingenious had the idea to play "hide and seek".

All of them liked the idea and immediately Madness shouted:

"I want to count, I want to count!" And since nobody was crazy enough to want to seek Madness, all the others agreed. Madness leaned against a tree and started to count: "One, two, three..."

As Madness counted, the vices and virtues went hiding. Tenderness: on the horn of the moon, Treason, in a pile of garbage. Fondness curled up between the clouds and Passion, to the center of the earth. Lie said that it would hide under a stone, but hid at the bottom of the lake, whilst Avarice entered a sack that he ended up breaking. And Madness continued to count: "... seventy nine, eighty, eighty one..."

By this time, all the vices and virtues were already hidden – except Love. For undecided as Love is, he could not decide where to hide. And this should not surprise us, because we all know how difficult it is to hide Love.

Madness: "...ninety five, ninety six, ninety seven..." Just when Madness got to one hundred, Love jumped into a rose bush where he hid. And Madness turned around and shouted: "I'm coming, I'm coming!"

As Madness turned around, Laziness was the first to be found, du to his lack of energy to hide. Then he spotted Tenderness in the horn of the moon, Lie at the bottom of the lake and Passion at the centre of the earth. One by one, Madness found them all - except Love. Madness was getting desperate, unable to find Love. Enviousof Love, Envy whispered to Madness: "You only need to find Love, and Love is hiding in the rose bush."

Madness grabbed a wooden pitch fork and stabbed wildly at the rose bush. Madness stabbed and stabbed until a heartbreaking cry made him stop. Love appeared from the rose bush, covering his face with his hands. Between his fingers ran two trickles of blood from his eyes.

Madness, so anxious to find Love, had stabbed out Love's eyes with a pitch fork. "What have I done! What have I done!" Madness shouted.

"I have left you blind! How can I repair it?"

And Love answered: "You cannot repair my eyes. But if you want to do something for me, you can be my guide."

And so it came about that from that day on, Love is blind and is always accompanied by Madness.

The Myth of Islamic Scholarship

2008-05-01T22:50:00.000-07:00

Muslims developed the concept of institutions where everyone, regardless of race, colour or religion can had the opportunity to learn everything (universal knowledge), which are called Universities today. The square-hat came from previous Muslims who had the culture of placing the Koran on the head of graduates to take oaths that they would be good and responsible citizens. The first two Universities of the world were built in Egypt and Morocco; obviously neither country existed at the time.

The university concept was derived from the Koran, which guides and encourages the seeking of universal knowledge and empirical thinking, and this in return gave birth to the renaissance and the modernization of Europe as we see it today. It is intriguing that after centuries of intellectual efforts from previous Muslims dedicated to learning various sciences, today we a approaching people with relatively narrow scholarship. The Koran in contrast suggests that if someone has questions about a field, for example cloning or quantum mechanics, they should consult the people who are qualified in that particular field. Now somebody with knowledge could be a Jew, a Christian or anyone, say a Martian if there is one. There is a problem when universal knowledge is narrowly defined as Islamic Scholarship. We can have a Muslim scientist or science scholar who is an atheist; it does not make a difference because knowledge can be verified. The so called Islamic Scholarship is a misconception because Islam cannot be mastered; it can only be expended through a collective psyche of all human interaction and learning within the Universe, regardless of their backgrounds. The myth of Islamic Scholar has failed the Muslims for last 100 years and is still evident. One of the characteristics of Islamic Scholars is that they have set a monopoly on Universal knowledge and general intelligence. Knowledge gained, for example through an institution can be acquired by anybody. I do believe that if a Christian is graduated from an Institution in Saudi Arabia, he will not be called a Muslim Scholar owing to the fact that Knowledge is not attached to a narrow creed. To understand Islam one needs to understand the Universe and everything within it, which is an infinite search in conjunction with the changing of times and situation of human existence and experience. If a scientific or philosophical outcome is a fact here, it remains accepted and remains a fact else ware. The fact is the Universities developed by the Muslims were not religious institutions in the narrow sense and hence there is no such thing as Islamic Scholars. The myth of Islamic scholarship has had negative effect on the Muslim psyche tremendously. Mainly the Muslims have been driven backwards after bridging the Greeks concepts to the renaissance through learning and developing Universities. Islam is a way of life; it is universal and entails universal knowledge from all walks of life, not from exclusive scholars. This myth is not new as intellectuals such as Ibn Rushed argued that Islam allows competent scholars to interpret the Koran, and philosophers are better qualified in this regard than theologian by virtue of their understanding of truths of science and philosophy. Hence we have to redefine Islamic scholarship with the spirit of modern philosophy to generate a more cohesive-peaceful society.

Islamic Clothing According to Qura'an

2008-05-01T22:47:00.000-07:00

Why do Muslims dress in distinctive, modest clothing? Muslim women are often asked: "Why do you wear that scarf?" "Aren't you hot?" "Do the different colors mean anything?" "Why do some women cover their face, but not others?" "Do men have a dress code as well?" Most Muslims understand your polite curiosity, and would be happy to explain. But if you've ever been too embarrassed to ask the questions directly, you've come to the right place.

Q: Why do you dress the way you do?

A: First and foremost, because Almighty God (Allah) commands us to do so. In the Qur'an, Allah tells the believers to "lower their gaze and be modest." Specifically, it says: "Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that will make for greater purity for them; and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; and that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what must ordinarily appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their chests and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers..." (Qur'an 24:30-31) Of course, Muslims believe that God has full Wisdom and knows what is best for us, so we strive to follow His guidance in every aspect of our lives. Muslims have also discovered other advantages to dressing modestly, including: being known for who you really are; not being judged by your beauty or lack thereof; being able to conduct business in an atmosphere of respect; being readily known as a Muslim; liberation; comfort.

Q: Aren't you hot?

A: In many ways, covering the body protects it from the heat of direct sunlight. In loose, flowing clothing, the air around the body flows freely and cools more readily. The choice of fabric covering the body is more important than the square inches/centimeters exposed or covered. On severely hot days, we might be uncomfortable as is everyone else. During those times, we find comfort knowing that we are following the commands of Allah, and "the fire of hell is hotter.

Q: Do the different colors mean anything?

A: Muslims are to dress in modest clothing, without attracting attention to oneself. For this reason, many Muslims choose earth-tone colors such as green, blue, gray, as well as the usual black and white. Beyond this, there are no specific meanings behind the choice of color. Some colors are more common in certain parts of the world, based on local tradition.

Q: Why are there differences in the specific styles of dress?

A: While Islam outlines a code of modesty, it does not command a certain style, color, or fabric. The range of clothing you find among Muslims is a sign of the great diversity among the Muslim community.

Q: Do men have a dress code as well?

A: Absolutely. Both men and women are commanded in the Qur'an to "lower their gaze and be modest." It is generally understood that men are not to expose the area of their body from the navel to the knee. However, many Muslim men would feel shy to expose a bare chest or bare legs in public. As with women, men are not to wear clothing that is tight or see-through. Indeed, in many Muslim societies the traditional clothing for men includes long, flowing robes, or long tunics that fully cover the body.

Human rights in contemporary Islamic thought: Toward a cross-cultural discourse ethic

2008-05-01T22:40:00.000-07:00

Human Rights in Contemporary Islamic Thought is an experiment in comparative religious ethics. I analyze the writings of Sayyid Qutb, Abul A''la Maududi, and Abdolkarim Soroush to show how a range of Islamic thought contributes to the cross-cultural dialogue necessary for the progression of universal human rights. The chapters of the dissertation, arranged thematically, offer a comparative understanding of the issues at stake. The first two chapters provide histories of the last century, focusing upon the Universal Declaration of Human Rights (1948) and colonialism in Muslim countries.

The inclusive process of drafting the Declaration sets an auspicious precedent for the incorporation of Islamic voices in human rights. Documented participation in creating the UDHR by representatives of countries such as Egypt, Pakistan, Lebanon, and Saudi Arabia helps to ensure the acceptance of human rights in Muslim countries.

The effectiveness of cross-cultural dialogue becomes especially apparent in the writings of Qutb and Maududi, who despite their criticisms of the UN and wariness of cultural imperialism, readily accept the validity of rights language. Following these histories are three chapters that focus on the views of Qutb, Maududi, and Soroush concerning “democracy,” “toleration,” and “freedom of conscience.” These discussions reveal not only their beliefs about these aspects of human rights, but also their relevant epistemologies and attitudes towards the West.

The final substantive chapter examines the possibility of dialogue between Islamic thinkers and human rights theorists, including Michael Ignatieff, Jack Donnelly, and Henry Shue. Non-foundational human rights models, espoused by Ignatieff, or models based upon Western paradigms, as recommended by Donnelly, are likely to alienate Islamic thinkers in cross-cultural discourses.

Shue''s observation of correlative duties as complementary to rights, however, presents a potentially useful framework for engaging Islamic scholars in the human rights debate. Fears of the threat to human rights posed by religious difference need to be balanced by the ways in which religions, including Islam, have contributed to the acceptance and implementation of human rights. By acknowledging the complexity of Islamic thought and finding common ground, a universal human rights ethic becomes possible.

Environment - Tips For Saving Energy - Electronics

2008-03-27T22:01:00.000-07:00

Before you buy
The computers, monitors, printers and scanners may bear certain symbols (the Eco-label or energyStar, for example) if they are saving energy.
When not being used, a computer with the label is in the way of low consumption. Thus, consumes about 80% less energy than in normal operation.
The TFT displays use much less energy than a traditional model. With the label, you can save about 90% of energy.
If the graphic quality is not essential to the work it does at home, you can opt for ink-jet printers, which spend less than the models Laser and that, moreover, are much cheaper.
Almost all devices have a stand-by mode, but should spend less energy on this modality. It is possible to manufacture electronic devices that consume less than 0.5 Watts in an stand-by or did not even involve any spent.
If you discard is a device that still works, can doá it to charity organizations or schools.
Before discarding, for example, a computer, you can call the manufacturer and ask if working in a framework of a programme of recovery for recycling. Anyway, in the purchase of new electronic material, the merchant is required to resume the old and reencaminhá it for dismantling and recycling. It is a service, which can not be charged. The Foundation AMI (International Medical Assistance) containers placed in specific companies, associations, schools and shops for the collection of consumable parts, ink cartridges and toners, and mobile phones, damaged or in disuse. You can also depositing it in ecocentros that accept or at the collection of waste electrical and electronic equipment.

Use
When you are not using a device, rather than leave on stand-by, disconnect it. It is not feasible for certain devices, such as an alarm clock, a fax or a DVD recorder. But it costs you turn off the TV, a printer and equipment. At the end of the year, with this simple gesture, you can save a hundred euros in electricity.
Do not leave the equipment with shippers connected to the mains, having already a full load. Mobile, toothbrush, shaving machines, electric, portable vacuum cleaners, among others, are some examples. To this end, it would be useful if the batteries were always equipped with an indicator of the level of loading.
Avoid printing everything that receives, opting for store some information on the computer. Choose save the documents most commonly used in a folder of easy access or create a favorites list. Instead of making corrections in the paper, accustomed to them directly on the computer.
When you need even to print a document, refer to the "draft" because it is faster and spend less ink. Choose to print on the front and the back of the leaves, if your printer has this option. You can also reuse sheets used, printing new documents on the reverse side.
At the end of the day or when not to use the computer for a period exceeding two hours, unplug it. Contrary to what some people think, turn on and off many times the computer does not damage the machine and allows save energy.

Heart Attacks :Causes And Effects

2008-03-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

Heart Attacks: Cause And Effects Part of maintaining a healthy lifestyle is to know, at each stage of one''s life, what diseases or dangers one faces. Infants, for example, are extremely susceptible to colds because their immune systems are not fully developed. Children under the age of 10 have a very high chance of getting the chicken pox. Men and women between the ages of fifteen and twenty-five are at high risk of becoming infected with HIV/AIDS. Adults over the age of forty become increasingly at risk for having a heart attack. Since February is American Heart Month, I thought this would be an excellent time to research some of the causes and effects of heart attacks.

A heart Attack is caused by the build-up of fatty substances, cholesterol, calcium and other substances that make up plaque. plaque can begin to build up within the inner linings of the larger arteries of the body in childhood, but it takes much longer, usually thirty years or more, for the build-up to escalate to dangerous levels. This process of plaque build-up is called atherosclerosis, a process which is quickened by having high blood pressure or cholesterol, diabetes or especially by smoking. Over time the build-up of plaque severely limits the flow of blood to the heart, specifically to the myocardium, the middle layer of the wall of the heart (the outer layer is called the epicardium, and the inner layer is the endocardium). The myocardium is the main muscle which allows blood to flow in and out. In fact, according to the American Heart Association, "the medical term for a heart attack is myocardial infarction." Because less blood is getting through to the heart, oxygen, which is carried within the blood cells, also becomes limited. If one or more artery (arteries) becomes completely blocked, a heart attack follows. If immediate treatment, usually surgery to clear up the arteries, is not administered, the muscles of the heart become permanently injured, causing the patient to die or become disabled. A heart attack can, less frequently than by the complete blocking of the arteries, also be caused by a severe spasm or tightening of the coronary artery, which temporarily cuts off blood flow from the heart. While causes of artery spasms are not widely agreed upon, it is believed that they may be caused by smoking cigarettes, heightened stress, or by taking certain illegal drugs like cocaine. Warning signs of a heart attack are varied and usually do not precede an attack by more than five minutes, so it is necessary to act quickly. Some such warning signs are prolonged or recurring (over the time period of a few minutes) discomfort or irritation in the chest or arms, shortness of breath, which is usually proceeded by the afore-mentioned discomfort, or a feeling of being lightheaded. Treatments for heart attacks vary depending on severity of the condition and how far in advance the condition was discovered. Most common is an angioplasty procedure, which is when a small tube is placed inside an artery in order to reinstate and facilitate blood flow to the heart. Medications likewise vary from case to case, but most commonly, beta blockers are given to patients to, according to the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute, "decrease the workload on your heart ... to prevent additional heart attacks."A new treatment is emerging now for preventing heart attacks years before they start. In November 2003, Dr. Eric Topol of the Cleveland Clinic and his team of scientists were able to locate the first gene known to directly cause heart attacks. This discovery was found with the help of an Iowan family, the Steffensens, which had suffered from heart attacks for generations. Out of ten siblings, nine had their first heart attack between the ages of 59 and 62, and many have had more than one heart attack. And the one sibling exempt from the heart attacks was found not to have the gene. This particular gene "creates weak artery walls", which make heart attacks a practical guarantee. And now that the gene has been identified, it can be isolated and prevented from spreading.

What Is The Love?

2008-03-25T21:50:00.000-07:00

Love is regarded as a set of attitudes, behaviors and responses unconditional and selfless, manifested among intelligent beings capable of developing their reciprocity. Much of the emotional quality individuals, will be closely linked to elements of culture, education and religious and environmental influences also has been developed where the person. Love is not only confined to the human race, which is a rational response, but also to all those people who can develop emotional ties with another, as is the case with the animals usually associates the word with romantic love, a passionate relationship between couples with a significant influence on their interpersonal relationships and sex. But the term also applies to various other relationships, such as love or platonic love family, and also more broadly speaking of love for God, nature, humanity as a whole which is often associated with empathy , and others in most cases means great affection for something that causes pleasure or happiness for those who perform the action of love. Philosophically, it is generally thought that love is the only sentiment that has no polarity, as is the case with the concepts of peace, or war, popularly contrasted avoided or rejected, with attitudes of contempt or selfishness. In the monotheistic religious culture, love is mentioned and be supported by God, as in the case of Islam, Judaism and Christianity. In the Bible, especially in the New Testament presents a definition of love as the culture of the times: The feeling known as love is not just a simple biological response, but a concept of cultural burden that is ordinary polysemic (has many meanings) hence it is difficult to explain in precise terms. But from the point of view of biology, which is sometimes called love hormone seems to be the answer as a means for the survival of individuals and the species. If preservation is the most important biological purpose, it is logical that the human race will confer a sense of love and transcendent very high, which contributes to the retention of emotional ties. But some people seem to exist in terms of what is called "love" that are not directly related to survival. Sexual relations with individuals of the same gender as homosexuality or lesbianism, or intimate relationships only for pleasure, examples are not unique to the human species. Altruistic behaviors observed from individuals of a species to the other, as the relationship between ancient man and the dog are an example of feelings unrelated to reproduction. Some biologists try to explain such behavior in terms of cooperation for the survival or exceptional behaviors insubstantial. From the years 1990 psychiatrists, anthropologists and biologists have begun to find significant relationship between the levels of hormones such as serotonin, dopamine and oxytocin with states emotional or sexual attraction, love and love stable. Undoubtedly points are controversial, emotional define a relationship that begins with a simple friendship deepens and then beyond, opening the floodgates of marriage, privacy, or admiration that in many cases turns out to be more of the physical that sentimental But those couples in some cases with bipolar disorder remain for long periods in their relations.

How To Identify The Job You Like

2008-03-24T21:58:00.000-07:00

But is it easy to now whether you will like the job offered to you?

You can seek professional advice to chose your line of specialization in the university. You can, by understanding your past performance and experiences, decide what you like and what you do not.
Or if one who has a talent for singing has to work as an engineer?
Say one with who is a genius with numbers end up teaching a language!

I enjoy reading, writing and speaking, but I went also to study engineering and worked for years as an engineer. Hence I did not succeed either as an engineer or as a writer or speaker. There has been no focus in my life and I have never enjoyed what I do. I can escape by saying that I had no one to guide me or that I was so poor that I had to chose
A subject which would ensure a decent job.
But there is no meaning in thinking or saying like this. One can get a decent job (read income) in any line. It is absolutely important to choose what you will enjoy. There is no second life to live in what you like.

Let this not happen to those who read this. See that you do what you enjoy ( may be it requires a good choice by trial and error, but once you land in something you like stick there irrespective of the other negatives.

Who is your enemy?

Normally you feel there are so many enemies for you. That there so many out there who
wants to harm you. You feel that whatever you do, they will say bad about you and try to see that you fail everywhere.
But who is your real enemy?
The one whom you consider your enemy is your real enemy. You do not believe?
Your enmity and hostility is understood by your adversary.
Your internal communications, body physiology, thoughts and attitudes convey enmity.

They are easily picked up by the subconscious mind of your so-called enemy. As a result, he will feel hostility towards you. And, they start behaving to you in a hostile way. This, in turn, picked up by your subconscious mind and you become more inimical. It becomes a vicious cycle.

Irrespective what the other one shows or behaves if you forgive him sincerely and make up with him mentally and see him as a friend in your mind and shake hand sincerely, and assume a friendly body language, he will be your friend before soon. If you show enmity in your face or body language nothing you say or do will matter. But if you take him as a friend both in mind and body he will be your friend very soon

Linky Love

2008-03-11T02:51:00.000-07:00

Linky Love
Cut and paste the following starting here.I have randomly selected 5 of you below to be tagged and I hope that you will similarly publish this post in your blog. You will have to tag 5 other bloggers and just keep adding on to the list. (Do not replace, just keep on adding! Yes we hope it will be a long list!)It’s real easy! Tag others and see your Technorati Authority increase exponentially!---------------------------------------------------------------------------------The benefits of Viral Linking:- One of the fastest ways to see your technorati authority explode!- Increase your Google PageRank fast- Attract large volume of new traffic to your site- Build your community- Make new friends!The Strategist Notebook Link Addiction Ardour of the Heart When Life Becomes a Book The Malaysian Life Yogatta.com What goes under the sun Roshidan’s Cyber Station Sasha says Arts of Physics And the legend lives My View, My Life A Simple Life Juliana RW The Callalily Space Petra Summer in Blue Confessions of an Army Wife Bless’ Sanctuary Happy Life La Place de Cherie Chez Francine Little Peanut Pea in a Pod The Creative In Me Me and Mine Pinay Mommy Expressions from the Heart TeacherJulie Sweetbites by Bang Paul, Toni and Lance - Bridging the Distance Our Growing Family The Uncensored life of me My Untamed World Me, Myself and I I Shot The Sheriff, My So Called Life, Jhaney's Photo Blog,
alanzain borak2u

I'm tagging alanzain, Too Much TV, Rock Star Momma speedcat hollydale,

Master list big bang world record

2008-02-23T21:57:00.001-08:00

*Start Copy Here*You do not have to be tagged to play along. This game is simple and so are the rules.
1. Copy from *Start Copy Here* through *End Copy Here*
2. Add your site(s) to the list. Just be sure to post at each site you add.
3. Tag or don’t tag, your choice, however, the more tags you create the bigger the list will grow.
4. Let me know your blog’s name and url by leaving me a comment HERE. I will add you to the master list. (If you would like a scroll box code, leave me your email address and I will email it to you.) Scroll Box Example. (I decided not to use the box for the Big Bang for ease of copying.)
5. Come back and copy the master list back to your site, often. This process will allow late-comers to get as much link benefit as the first ones in. Once you are on the master list people who have participated earlier will update their bookmarks and help everyone lower than them out on the list.
1-Attitude, the Ultimate Power 2-Juliana's Site 3-Rusin Roundup 4-Grow Rich Along With Me 5-Comedy Plus 6-lynda's loft 7-Amel's Realm 8-MAX 9-Speedcat Hollydale 10-Mariuca 11-Complain Complain Complain 12-Mariuca's Perfume Gallery 13-Life Is A Roller Coaster 14-Sugar Queen's Dream 15-First Time Dad 16-Life 17-My Life 18-The Painted Veil 19-My Thoughts 20-DatCurious.com 21-Little Aussie Cynic 22-A Nice Place in the Sun 23-DatMoney.com 24-The Down Side OF Up 25-Ladyjava's Lounge 26-Cat Tales 27-moms.....check nyo 28-Colorado Baby 29-It's a Woman's World 30-ENLIGHTENED BITS 31-My View of "It" 32-My Reviews and Finds Along the Way 33-Our Hep Chat 34-Rantings of a Woman 35-The Callalily Space 36-Mom Knows Everything 37-Hazel 38-Chronicles and Tales Unlimited (RED) 39-From the Mouth of Jabber Jaws 40-Sunny Side Up Foodie & Lifestyle 41-Carmel Corn 42-Daily Stock Picks 43-The Whole New World 44-Wifespeak 45-Slavery Bliss 46-Rooms of My Heart 47-Unpredictable Life 48-My Life, My World 49- At Your Service 50-All About Ebay 51-Everything Amazon 52-Turn On, Tune In, Drop Out 53-My So-Called Site 54-New Wife Blog 55-Tendre Poison 323 56-Nick's Bytes 57-My Scratch Pad 58-Choc Mint Girl 59-Life Is Just Around the Corner... 60-Amori, poseia, art... virtuali by Hanna 61-Maryannaville 62-monaco - monaco's 63-Nyumix's Blog 64-read my mind - my keyboard monologues 65-Shower You Children With Love - The Right Way 66-Secret Agent Mama 67-Pinaymama's Diary 68-Answers to the Questions 69-Work of the Poet 70-A Total Blog 71-My life, my hope, my future 72-NORTE 73-A Window to Our World 74-Life as a Mom 75-FIELD OF DREAMS 76-lisgold 77-See Me for What You 78-Caught in The Stream 79-Pinay Mommy Online - My Home 80-foster me up 81-CRUEL VIRGIN 82-Garden of Moments in Blog 83-So Cute 84-Love Everlasting 85-WeLcOmE To My CriB 86-WELCOM TO PINAYSMILE'S JOURNEY 87-Ice's Icelog 88-Jenny's Wandering Thoughts 89-Hobbies and Such 90-Sweet Paradise 91-Mommy's Gibble Gabbles 92-Rusin Review's 93-My Small World 94-Little Peanut 95-Online Ramblings 96-My Mood My Feeling 97-BLOG it with ALLEN 98-Entertainment World 99-Let's Go Singapore 100-Firelynx 101-Catsy Carpe Diem 102-Every Beat Of My Heart 103-Always Da Fresh Princess 104-Listening.. Learning..Living 105-All About Mars 106-Syii From Afar 107-Some Thoughts I Have 108-From Here and Beyond 109-My Paid To Blog 110-Scholarship Corner 111-Cell Phone Review 112-"Apples of the Eyes" 113-It's All About Play 114-The Luttrull Journey 115-RennyBA's Terella 116-Unchained Melody 117-Out of the Blue 118-The Lure Of the Unknown 119-Maricel's 120-my blog 121-Spiff, the Spaceman 122-Living Well 123-The Dog Log 124-Catnip Corner 125-A Piece of Idea 126-Observations From the Back 40 127-Poetry by The Redneck Gypsy 128-Odd Facts 129-Juliana's Lair 130-My life is murphy's law 131-lisgoldsmemoirs 132-My memories, as time goes by 133-Somewhere over the rainbow 134-Blogging by Sandee 135-Our Journey to this so called life 136-Idaho Daily Photo 137-Memories that Never Fades.. 138-Anything goes 139-Your Caring Angels 140-Little Paces 141-Laketrees 142-PoeARTica 143-fracas 144-Just FraCas 145-Archies Archive 146-Growing Up Together 147-A Woman's Diary 148-Mother's Got A Dot Com 149-Close To You 150-Hot Shit Form Here 151-Astro Galaxy 152-Detector 153-Beauty is in the eye of the beholder 154-My Life is Peachy 155-The Down Side of Up 156-Magical Milestones 157-In Search of Life 158-RebelationsdotNet 159-Jen Jen's Place 160-Mimi Writes... 161-Strange but true 162-Depois de minha viagem 163-Your Perfect Wedding: 164-Make Money Online 165-Primitive Ornies and Bowl Fillers 166-Vegetarian Diet Lifestyle 167-Looking Out For You 168-BENOLSATUEM 169-OtherSide 170-Hacko's Site 171-where was I 172-Making Money Resources 173-text's Site 174-Movie Corner 175-Rahasia Bisnis Internet 176-Online Dating Tips 177-Beauty Kissing Tips 178-Forex Trading Tips 179-Singapore Tour Guide 180-PPC vs PTR 181-Indonesian Film 182-Adsense Success Stories 2008 183-Bali Tour 184-Paypal Indonesia 185-Review Bisnis Internet 186-Blog Daniel Scardua 187-Much of a muchness 188-Gagiers Amazing World 189-Clumsy Mommy 190-Leaotheblogger 191-PBDesigns Reading and Crochet Blog 192-Gagiers Striking Zone 193-DrowseyMonkey 194-Yesterday Today n Tomorrow 195-Auntie Dar's Life 196-Sky Windows... 197-Filippino Life Abroad 198-Leao the Blogger 199-Zoop's Rantings on Life 200-My Journey 201-A Sweet Taste of Life 202-This is a Miracle 203-Lavanderia Virtual 204- Nancies's Web - Family Life 205-Dating Profile of the Day 206-my wooden robot 207-My World 208-urban : trendy : lifestyle 209-Lucel Juliana's Library 210-Cooking Momster - My Life Journal 211-Anggie & Jeremy boy Online Journal 212-'Doc Doc Doc' 213-Transforming My Life 214-Gratitude Journal 215-Simplydunn.net 216-emila's illustrated blog 217-AZZY'S BLOG-A-ROONIE! 218-MAMABLISS' TREASURED MOMENTS 219-The Sky's the Limit 220-PROJECT HEAVY TRAFFIC 221-just another ordinary story.. 222-Samuel Rolo 223-The end mission! 224-R S S Submissions 225-Laice's Pics 226-Health and Fitness 227-Brainybimbo 228-Journey with WaterLearner 229-Zoop's Rantings on Life (at Blogspot) 230-Dear Me (Ivan) 231-Tour the Tabon Caves 232-Book Calendar 233-Love me. 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My Precious ... 367-MY VIEWS ON MY SO CALLED LIFE 368-A Reality Bite 369-Cobb Community 370-Angelea's Blog 371-Janeth Vicy's Life Journey 372-NinaRepublic 373-Peaceful Mind 374-ME, MYSELF + 2 375-Mommy Jane and Little Sophia's Fasion misADVENTURES 376-ONKNEES - ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK..... 377-SHEENISM 378-SAILIN' THRU LIFE (ASecretPlace) 379-Project Management Tutorial 380-Labindalawang Piraso ng Kokomban 381-Gorgeous Traveller 382-Sharing Gifts and Ideas 383-MUMBLINGS 384-Because Life Is Fun 385-PsychPatient MD 386-Everything Is Free 387-BRAINY MOMMY 388-Simply Unique 389-precious moments 390-Pearly Scripts 391-LIGHTNING AND THUNDER 392-Rayani Friends 393-WORK CULTURE 394-Psychology 395-Gold News 396-Applied Psychology 397-Scientific Psychology 398-Backwoods Drifter 399-New Beginning 400-Life in General 401-Life Is Like That (That's Life) 402-Life With Roxxymetal 403-SEXY MOMMA 404-The Z Files 405-I'll Never Forget the Day I Read a Book! 406-DOODLE PAGE 407-Escape Hatch 408-The Official Afterslaughter Weblog 409-Mommy's Little Corner 410-MALTED MONKEY 411-MOM AND THE CITY 412-Life with the Two Crazy Dogs 413-the joys (and pains) of being a woman (My Untamed World) 414-Making Cents-Sense of Technology 415-USER GAME REVIEWS 416-Write Shy 417-DOMANTYS.net 418-ZWANG 419-ANYTHING GOES! (my world, my place, my views...!) 420-Matt's blog (World of Insanity) 421-Lifestyle chronicles 422-The Alien Next Door 423-CMAQUEST 424-The Mascot 425-NARUTO ADDICT MANIA 426-Friendster Layouts 427-borneo tatoo...the original body ink 428-DOMANTIX 429-CULTURED SHOCK 430-EuWorx 431-HUBPRIME 432-STAR SURFACE 433-MY KALEIDOSCOPE WORLD 434-luckycharms 435-John's Blog - Maybe I Am Joking? 436-NEW WORDPRESS THEMES 437-WEB VIDEO HITS 438-TOP MUSIC VIDEOS 439-TEXT MESSAGES 440-Homemade Haven 441-TAGMEMEAWARD CAT 442-Coriander Dreams 443-BrainLoops 444-Soul Meets World 445-Speak The Speech 446-The Tall Poppy 447-My Day Off 448-Internet Business Promotions and Opportunities 449-Gage's World 450-PIXY ROSE 451-John's Cynical Blog 452-Poliblog 453-Techcheck 454-RoseateMarketingTips.com 455-RUSTYGANGSTER 456-Napaboaniya's Music Videos 457-EZINE PRIME 458-Prime Scrolls 459-FactMundo: World of Facts 460-CHAE 461-GOLDFINGER 462-OnlineBiz and Resources 463-ASTRO GALAXY TRAVEL 464-The Singapore Housewife 465-Climate of Our Future 466-Anorexic Queen 467-Eleanoreblog 468-Turnip of Power 469-Old Life 470-Shiphire Dustbin 471-POSTCARD HEADLINES 472-crazyblog 473-V.Col 474-Simple Life, Simply Me 475-Rasso Photoblog 476-Bagwine Ruminations 477-The Travel Bug 478-Short Stories 479-OPENGIGA TECH 480-Yogatta Dot Com 481-Net Diary of Rasal 482-WORDPRESS MEME 483-divaness 484-Thinking Tunnel 485-My decisions, my mistakes, my feelings, my LIFE 486-E-News (Gossip, Scandals, Movies, Music, etc) 487-FRAPPUCINO JOWN 488-MAYBELLE DOODLES 489-And the Legend Lives 490-In His Time - Endless Frontier 491-Travels in Time 492-Money Making Reports 493-MY HAPPY PLACE 494-The M&M Online BloG 495-Carol's Corner 496-http://individualathome.blogspot.com/ 497-Confessions of a Social Climber 498-Moderately-Confused Pinay In Deutschland 499-BLOGSILOG 500-DigiScrapz: Captured Memories 501-Cherry’s Comfort Zone 502-Thinking Out Loud 503-Wishing and Hoping 504-Jobs for Davao 505-Jobs for Abroad 506-PRC Exam Results 507-Wish Washy 508-Captains bridge 509 Colourrain 510 Modus Vivendi 511-Our Hep Chat 512-I forgot where I was going with this... 513-MRS FANCYPANTS LIVE 514-Real Estate News and Tips 515-MY.........STORIES 516-Garaphernalia 5.0 517-Everything Everywhere Travel Blog 518-lane of memories 519-Avee's Adeventures 520-Celebrating Life 521-Me and the World 522-Paul, Toni and Lance ----- Bridging The Distance 523-Paul and Toni 524-This is My New Chapter of Life 525-Online Competitions 526-posh lifestyle 527-Creative In Me 528-Life's Lessons 529-KERSLYN'S COMFORT ZONE 530-Piece of Mine 531-One World One Dream 532-HUMBLE HOME OF OURS 533-Life Is Beautiful; Life Is Love 534-Journey of Two 535-Tutiger's Blog 536-JORDAN CREEK 537-NEURO PATCH 538-Tour and Travel 539-Musings of a Daydreamer 540-DELICIOUS YOUNG BOI 541-SugarMagnolias 542-Heart and Style Woman 543-SURREAL-GEORGIA 544-Girls Do It All 545-OgenDicht/EyesClosed 546-Christy DeKoning; Travels in Watercolor 547-living life to the fullest 548-Holy Cuteness 549-FILIPINOLIFEABRAOD 550-Filipina Love stories 551-Interracial Marriages 552- SWEETHEART ALLEN 553-Living laughing and loving 554-A Day to Savor and Relish 555- Catsy's Pet Blog 556- SimplyCatsy's BLogs 557- Catsy's Out of the Blue 558-Mohanitguy 559- ItBuddy 560-alanzain 561-3 Sides of Crazy 562-Life abroad wifey 563-My Life's Rollercoaster Ride 564-ONLINE ENTREPRENEUR 565-Verb 566-Laptop Tip 567-US GIRLS 568-Our Journey as a Family 569-Let's talk....everythi... in one space 570-http://oscar-vg.blogspot.com/ 571-BENOLSATUEM 572-blockbuster movie trailers 573-Bodybuilding & Fitness 574-Lemon Iced Tea and Me 575-GloboGeek 576 INSERT YOURSELF HERE
*End Copy Here*

Big bang world record

2008-02-23T01:15:00.000-08:00

Start Copy Here*

You do not have to be tagged to play along. This game is simple and so are the rules.
1. Copy from *Start Copy Here* through *End Copy Here*
2. Add your site(s) to the list. Just be sure to post at each site you add.
3. Tag or don’t tag, your choice, however, the more tags you create the bigger the list will grow.
4. Let me know your blog’s name and url by leaving me a comment HERE. I will add you to the master list. (If you would like a scroll box code, leave me your email address and I will email it to you.) Scroll Box Example. (I decided not to use the box for the Big Bang for ease of copying.)
5. Come back and copy the master list back to your site, often. This process will allow late-comers to get as much link benefit as the first ones in. Once you are on the master list people who have participated earlier will update their bookmarks and help everyone lower than them out on the list.

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*End Copy Here*

How to succeed by changing your behavior?

2008-02-10T04:33:00.000-08:00

by Marshall Goldsmith

Marshall says that people who are already successful are there because they are intelligent and skilful; all that stops them from reaching the next level is usually some irritating interpersonal behavior and once this is addressed and changed, their success is bound to multiply. He has helped many global leaders to overcome annoying habits.

Seven types:

Adding too much value

Imagine a friend of you comes up with a suggestion, for e.g. to market a property and says he intends to put an advertisement in a national daily. Instead of simply telling him that it is a great idea and ask him to go ahead and revert to if need be. Suppose if you suggested him in which paper to advertise and how to word the advertisement. May be you would have added 10% value but took away 50% of his motivation because the idea was no longer his, it became yours.

Winning too much

The need to win at all times and at all costs. We should sometimes curb the need to always come on top, in spite of our skills and knowledge way above others in the company.

Passing judgment

Whether there is a need to rate others and make comparisons. Closely linked to adding value is the immediate comparison radar that goes up when we see something others have done. A simple acceptance of another’s work style is needed, for e.g. in written documentation – so long as there are no glaring errors. Everyone cannot have a uniform style or match our own.

Starting with no, but or however

Excessive use of these negative qualifiers is a way of telling the world we are right and they are wrong. When someone gives us an idea or a plan, if our reaction starts with “no, but…” it dampens their spirit. Each time we catch ourselves using these words, let’s levy a $10 “fine” on ourselves and contribute the money to a kitty so that some good cause gets rich at the cost of our behavior change!

Speaking when angry

Using emotional outbursts to manage others. Suppose if a client of yours speaks in raised decibel levels and showers angry words on one of your valuable colleague. If the above ends in the colleague’s resignation and no amount of cajoling could get the colleague to change his mind. Anger is temporary madness, and it is best to raise one’s tolerance level instead of one’s voice. A thoughtful “one-minute” reprimand as Kenneth Blanchard recommends is a good way, spoken after the wave of anger has passed.

Withholding information

We should do so, like we will have an advantage over others. As an entrepreneur, one of our biggest challenges is how to get cross selling to happen between various departments that are flourishing individually. Keeping the bigger picture of the company above us would banish withholding of information.

Failing to say thank you

When there is a need to thank others. Sometimes, the easiest things to do are also the easiest things not to do. When someone on our team does something worthy why not simply thank them?

What you want to be..........

2007-11-03T02:51:00.000-07:00

In next 5 years what you want to be....To me i just want to make my life more easier and happy life with my be loving wife and my son....nothing more.Now i try to start a new life to make my dream come true....and nothing less, i love to write down all the past memories to make me realise how difficult to live in this world.Thank God for everything.